


Argon & Ashes

by SothisJones



Category: Deadpool (Movieverse)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Deadpool 2 Spoilers, Drinking, Drug-Induced Sex, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt, Karaoke, Kissing, Neck Kissing, Non-Consensual, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Oral Sex, Pain, Poetry, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rape, Rape Recovery, Sex, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-09-02
Packaged: 2019-06-14 08:06:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 11
Words: 27,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15384387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SothisJones/pseuds/SothisJones
Summary: Laurel Bevingete, a friend of Wade Wilson's from middle school meets up with him again and finds herself pulled into X-Force's strange world, quickly developing an attraction for Nathan Summers.





	1. To Friends (Normal or Not)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Fact one: I have friends other than a bartender and a blind senior citizen and two: I want you to meet her.”

Deadpool skipped through the X-Force wing of the Mansion in his pink bunny slippers and striped robe. He found Colossus and Domino sitting quietly around the kitchen table with newspaper, coffee mugs, and the remains of breakfast dishes strewn across the table.

The quiet scene was disturbed as soon as Deadpool noticed everyone sitting at the table. “Guys! I have, like, the most incredible news. We’re having company tonight!” Wade was nearly vibrating with glee as he delivered the news. “I know you all have nothing better to do, so I expect you’ll be around. Beers on the patio after the kiddies are done for the day.”

“Who’s the guest?” inquired Domino, more to break the awkward silence than from curiosity.

“A friend. From school.” Everyone turned to face Deadpool. “It’s so rad! She just moved, looked up me an’ Weasel! She came into Sister Margaret’s last night. She doesn’t know anyone here but us and I thought it would be fun to actually have some fun around here. It’s like a funeral home most nights. She moved away after graduation for college and a career, and then shit hit the fan: blah, blah, asshole boyfriend, new boyfriends, blah, breakups. What else do you do when life sucks balls but start again in a new city?”

Deadpool put his hands on his hips. “Also you now know two new facts about me. Fact one: I have friends other than a bartender and a blind senior citizen and two: I want you to meet her.”

Domino stood up. “Fine. But I’m not drinking that shitty beer you buy, Wade. I’m going to pick up some red wine and hope your friend has some taste and joins me drinking it.” She started to walk to her room.

“But how will you know it’s something she likes?” Wade asked.

“I’m sure I’ll think of something,” Domino tossed over her shoulder.

“This is so good for Wade!” Colossus had clearly been looking forward to this evening; all day be commented on his anticipation for meeting Wade’s friend, or approval with such a normal activity from the hyperactive mercenary.

The gate to the yard squeaked as it opened. “Guys, it is my honour to introduce you to my friend. Laurel, meet my friends, colleagues, housemates: Domino and Colossus. Hey where’s Robopop? Lost? Wandering around in a senile daze?”

“He is on mission, Wade, but will be back tonight,” Colossus explained.

Laurel stood about a head shorter than Deadpool, with deep brown hair arranged in a messy bun.

Colossus stood and offered his hand to the woman. “Hello Laurel. Piotr. Very pleased to meet a friend of Wade’s.” Laurel shook Colossus’ hand and smiled.

“Please, sit. Neena has purchased something better than Wade’s normal beer for you.”

Domino stood up. “Domino, Neena. You like red wine? I got some California Zins for us.”

“Anything’s better than Wade’s choice in beer, and Zinfandel is my favourite. I would love some.”

Domino fetched two glasses of wine and the bottle and handed one to Laurel.

“To normal friends and not-normal friends!” Deadpool extended his glass, followed by everyone else.

“Cheers!”

What followed was an evening of Laurel and Wade reminiscing about their incredibly normal-sounding youth. Wade and Laurel had known each other since middle school and had been a part of the same circle of friends until they went their separate ways in their early twenties. Colossus and Domino laughed heartily at Deadpool’s expense as Laurel told stories of their youthful misadventures.

Night had fallen by the time Cable returned. He was filthy and exhausted, longing for a shower and a beer. Hearing voices on the patio he swore under his breath, not looking forward to dealing with whatever his teammates were up to.

He stepped into the yard and saw Deadpool, Colossus, Domino, and a strange woman. He sighed as the night seemed to go from bad to worse.

“Big Daddy,” called Wade. “Come meet our new friend!”

 _Might as well get this over with,_ he thought. Squaring his shoulders he strode over to the patio where the trio were gathered. Domino and the new friend were drinking wine and Wade and Colossus were drinking the shitty, cheap beer that Wade always stocked.

“Laurrrrrr-el,” Wade singsonged. “Meet our resident Robocop. Cable, this is my friend Laurel, We go way back.”

Laurel turned around nearly collided with Cable, who was standing right behind her. Her steadied her with his human hand.

“Oh, sorry,” she said. She looked him up and down, and suddenly Cable was conscious of the dirt smudged on his face and the probability that his shirt was bloody.

“Careful, darlin’. Don’t want you to trip and hurt yourself.” He held onto Laurel’s arm a beat too long before extending his hand to her. “Cable, pleased to meet you.”

Laurel shook Cable’s hand, and swore that his left eye glowed like an ember before fading to a normal brown. He glimmered with tightly leashed violence and strength.

“Sorry! I’m a bit clumsy at the best of times,” she smiled. She stepped past Cable to sit in the empty chair between Deadpool and Colossus. He smelled her perfume as she went by, something sweet and spicy.  Cable smoothed his hands over his head to ensure at least his hair was in place.

“Cable you smell like ass. Go clean yourself up,” Wade taunted. “We have company,” he pointed out, rather redundantly.

Before he could retort Colossus broke in: “Yes, Nate. You should attend to yourself.” Domino snorted.

 _Fine._ Cable went into the house and had a shower, wondering about the appearance of Wade’s friend. She didn’t seem to be a threat in the few moments he looked into her gray eyes, but then again…she’s been a friend of Wade’s for a long time which made his question her judgement.

He dressed comfortably in a white t-shirt and gray joggers. He grabbed a beer from the fridge on the way back out to the patio. May as well see how someone could put up with that asshole and come back for more.

He found his housemates and Laurel laughing hysterically as Wade relayed a story about helping Laurel get revenge on an ex-boyfriend.

As Wade talked Cable took a look into his mind to see what he felt about this Laurel. He had rules about using his telepathy and this technically broke them, but he needed to be sure this girl showing up wasn’t a harbinger of trouble.

Wade’s mind was tough to read. His thoughts moved faster than his mouth did, and it was hard to filter the chaos within his mind. Cable thought it had something to do with his mutation or ongoing cancer-healing cycle. At any rate usually all he could get was Wade’s strongest emotion. What he felt was happiness and friendship. Huh. Nate sat back and crossed his arms. It seemed Wade saw no threat or suspicion and genuinely liked her.

A little later Domino popped the cork on the third bottle of wine. “This is our last one,” she sighed as she topped off both women’s glasses. “After this it’s Wade’s beer water.”

“Well, at least we started with the good stuff!” laughed Laurel.

“So, Laurel. You are not mutant?” Colossus questioned.

“Nope, not a mutant. Nothing special about me.”

“Oh, I am sure that is not true. Wade, tell us something about Laurel,” Colossus turned to the scarred man.

“Yeah and then tell us about what you thought when he told you his superhero origin story,” cracked Domino.

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s a good story. And mostly true,” grumbled Deadpool. “So, Laurel, what should I share about you? Your extraordinary alleged prowess under the football bleachers?”

“ _Hey!_ ” Laurel spluttered. “You started that rumour!”

“So I did,” mused Deadpool. “They probably want to know something that you did after you get out of your awkward teenage years. Hmm…” he tapped his chin as if in thought. “What about your poetry?”

“Poetry? Yes, Wade, tell us about that,” Colossus leaned forward eagerly.

“Well, Miss Bevingete here is a published, award-winning poet. Poetess? Is Poetess the correct term for your esteemed profession?”

“It’s _Ms_ Bevingete and poet is the correct term.”

“Ah-ah Miss Poetess. I know you’re just embarrassed that I brought it up,” chided Deadpool.

“You’re Laurel Bevingete?” Cable asked in disbelief. “Who wrote _Argon_?”

“Yeah…but work is only really known in small circles.” Laurel’s eyes were wide with surprise. “Generally only by other poets.”

 _“The days final ending/turned to ruin; a jagged night/of fractured moonlight and the breaking/of the ebb-tide of humanity,”_ quoted Cable.

The stunned silence was predictably broken by Deadpool. “How the fuck do you know Laurel’s poetry? Also: how the fuck do you know any poetry? Is it still a thing in the apocalypse?”

“We studied poetry. We aren’t ignorant of fine arts, you asshole. I picked _Argon_ to read because I liked it.” Cable crossed his arms defensively.

“Wait, no: it’s not possible that you could have studied it,” protested Laurel. “It was published for the first time in a magazine two years ago, and in my first book of poetry that was only published last year.”

“Oh, shit. I forgot to tell you. Cable is from the future,” Deadpool explained. “He’s like Robocop from fifty years from now, some dystopian future. Neat, huh? Looks like you’re the apocalyptical Shakespeare or something! You need to sign some shit for us in case it’s worth something in the future.” Wade paused for a moment. “Dude is fuckin’ metal. Like, literally he’s fifty percent metal,” he added. “It’s like we collect tin men around here.”

“I…don’t understand.” Laurel set her wineglass down. “How can you be from the future?”

These questions normally irked Cable, but Laurel’s didn’t sound like she thought his existence in her time or claim was impossible; she simply didn’t grasp the concept.

“Future technology. I came here for a mission. And now I can’t go back.” Cable drained the last of his beer and cracked open a new one, took a long swallow.

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, darlin’. Can’t do anything about it. But it might make you happy to know that your work is studied in the future. I really did…do like _Argon_.”

“Sounds like Russian poetry,” said Colossus. “Dark. I like it. ”

The night carried on. A full moon hung in the sky. Laurel was feeling the alcohol; she didn’t normally drink so much. After finishing the wine she and Domino had started drinking beer. The excitement of re-connecting with Wade and the strangeness of his new life and his friend’s situation was unreal. Mutants: of course she knew they existed; she’d worked with a few. But time travelling policemen? Who knew her work? She didn’t know where to begin unravelling that. She stood to follow Neena to the bathroom, and stumbled. She put her hand out to steady herself and felt the cool metal skin of Colossus.

“Sorry, Piotr,” she said with a smile. The silver man grinned at her.

“Is no problem. I think you should sleep here tonight. I would worry about getting you home so late.”

“Oh, no, I don’t…that’s not necessary,” she protested.

“Girl, you are practically swaying on your feet. Come with me and I’ll get you into the guest room. You can borrow something of mine to sleep in.” Neena gestured towards the house. “Let’s go!”

“Neena, there are extra toothbrushes in the guest bathroom,” called Colossus. Both women dissolved into giggles. “What?” he asked, confused.

Neena gave Laurel a t-shirt and yoga pants to wear to bed. “These should fit. Luckily we’re about the same size.” Laurel brushed her teeth and washed her face. How did she end up drinking with Wade Wilson, mutant mercenaries, and a time-travelling cop? She shook her head. This was nothing like what she’d anticipated she’d find after she moved back to her home city and looked up her old friends.

Laurel padded into the kitchen and found Piotr putting bottles in the recycling. “Oh, Laurel. I was going to bring you water.” He paused to retrieve a glass and poured some tap water into is. “Is filtered water,” he explained.

Laurel smiled as she accepted the glass and drank all of the water. She felt dehydrated and hoped she could head off the worst of the oncoming hangover. Piotr refilled her glass.

“Mutants and a poet,” he said as he busied himself with the bottles. “What a wonderful group we have! Now, is late. Come, I will walk you back to your room.”

Cable sat at his workbench long after the house fell into sleep cleaning and organizing his weapons. He stretched his mind out and found quiet. He felt Laurel’s presence in the house; something that was somehow quieter and softer than the mutants. A glow.

The lines he’d recited from her poem reverberated in his head along with the image he’d conjured up the first time he read the poem: a ruined city under a gibbous moon with the ocean tide pulling away from shore for the last time. A world destroyed, but quiet. The suffering over. That scene had stayed with him for decades and served as a vision of the world he was trying to prevent. And here was the author of that image: a human woman who had never known war.

His practiced hands moved over the pieces of his weapons as he thought of the strange occurrence. He didn’t believe in synchronicity; not exactly, but something about this felt like more than random chance.

Finally he finished with his things and dropped into bed. The beer took the edge from his habitual insomnia and a dreamless sleep took him.

The unusual sound of two women chatting jarred Cable until he remembered that Laurel had spent the night. She was out on the sunny patio with Domino wearing borrowed sunglasses and holding a large mug of black coffee. Cable poured himself some on his way out to the patio.

“Mornin’” he drawled at the women. Domino nodded and Laurel nodded weakly. “Hung over?” he inquired.

“A little,” she admitted. “I don’t drink a lot and we were up late last night.”

“Not enough water,” scolded Colossus as he came outside with a tall glass. “Drink more, Laurel.” She accepted the glass with a thanks,

“None for me?” pouted Domino.

“You know where glasses are,” Colossus returned mildly. “Laurel is our guest.”

“Is Wade up?” Laurel asked.

“Wade is gone,” answered Colossus. “A job. He asked that someone drive you home.”

“Sorry girl, I have to get. I have a job too,” Domino gulped her coffee and stood up. “Nice to meet you. Come by anytime!” Domino bounded into the house.

“That leaves you, Nate. Can you get our guest home?”

“Yeah, sure.”

They stopped the sleek black car outside of Laurel’s building. Cable put it in park and killed the engine.

“Thanks for driving me,” said Laurel as she opened the door.

“I’ll walk you to your door,” Cable said as he slid out of the car.

“Wow, I must have made a terrible impression last night!” laughed Laurel. “I’m sure I can make it to my place just fine.”

“I know, darlin; but – “ Cable held up a metal finger – “what if you were to trip up the stairs and hurt yourself? That dumbshit Wade would never let either of us live it down.”

“True. You know him well,” she returned as she led him to the main entrance.

“Unfortunately,” he grumbled.

They took the stairs to Laurel’s sixth-floor apartment. After she unlocked the door Cable followed her inside.

“Nice place,” he observed. The top-floor living space was small, but bright. He smelled something sweet lingering in the air; a ghost of her perfume. One wall was filled by a bookcase overflowing with books. A small desk sat opposite it with a closed laptop and stacks of paper surrounding it.

“You didn’t have any water this morning. Pitor will be disappointed.”

“You’re right. Could I – ?”

Laurel smiled. “Of course. I need more too. Have a seat.” Cable turned to the small living area: a loveseat with an end table and a coffee table.

Laurel returned with two glasses of ice water. She sat next to him on the couch, but at the very edge. He frowned. Was she nervous around him, alone? He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable. Obviously she was being polite, but it was clear his metal infection had to be off-putting.

“So…” she began. “I know a little about Neena, and way too much about Wade, but what about you, Nathan?”

“Nate’s fine.”

“Nate. I’m sure there has to be more than you being a policeman from the future.”

Cable chuckled. She’d taken Wade at his word. “Honey, I’m not a cop. I’m a soldier. I don’t arrest people. I fight.”

“Oh…”

He held up his metal arm. “What you really want to know about is this. It’s an infection; we call it techno-organic. It’s nothing for you to worry about though,”

Laurel blushed. “I didn’t – I don’t,” she stammered. She took a long drink of water. “I’m not worried about it,” she said softly.

Cable met her eyes, luminous and gray, and saw she was telling the truth. He sighed and put his glass on the table. “Darlin’, I didn’t mean to offend you. Look: I’m stuck in this strange time, but I’m from a time that’s more fucked up than you could image – “ he cut himself off as the images from Argon surfaced. He started again. “I come from a violent place, but it was home. Now I’m here with a bunch of mutants too weird for the X-Men and life softer than I’ve ever known.

Laurel looked up and took him in: the soldier’s body; the scarred flesh and metal. His eyes were hard, but the lines around his mouth softened.

“I’m an old man; change is tough,” he said.

“What was your mission?” Laurel questioned. :How come you came here?”

I have...had...a wife and a young daughter. I came here to save them. Prevent their death.  Stop one of the kids who’s being trained over in the X-Mansion from turning bad and killing many more besides them. I made a decision that meant that I couldn’t go back. I know they’re safe, though.”

His face shuttered. Laurel sensed this was the most she’d get from him.

His phone chirped in his pocket. He took it out and sighed. “Time to go,” he said as he stood up. Laurel stood and walked with him to the door. “Thanks for the water. And for the poem.”

“See you,” she said. He nodded. He paused outside and heard her close the door with a soft click followed by the lock turning into place. _Perfect_ , he thought as he made his way to the car. _Buys her about ten seconds against a motivated intruder_.

Back at the house he found Wade rifling through the kitchen cupboards.

“So did ya learn about Laurel’s bleacher time?” said Deadpool. “Get a little sugar from your Poetess?”

“Jesus fuck dude. She’s your friend.”

Deadpool shrugged. “She’s heard that and worse from me.” He grabbed a box of cookies and flopped down at the kitchen table with a handful of cookies. He pulled his mask off and began shoving them into his face.

“There was no bleacher incident,” declared Domino as she sauntered into the kitchen. “You made that up to keep some guy away from her in tenth grade.”

“Dude! She told you that?” Deadpool stopped, a cookie halfway to his mouth. “Chicks bond so quickly. Yeah. Kevin Lee. Real asshole. Would have hurt her. Liked to go with virgins then dump them.” He shoved the last cookie into his mouth. “Laurel has a real talent for dating assholes even as an adult,” he said with his mouth full.

“Did she date you?” asked Domino. “Seems like you fit her profile if assholes are her thing.”

“Nah,” Deadpool brushed the crumbs from his shirt. “She wasn’t my type. Isn’t.”

“Why not?” asked Domino. “She’s cute, she’s educated, she’s normal…oh. Too normal for you?”

Deadpool considered. “No, back in the day I was your standard asshole. No mutant powers. I had my pick of the chicks and I wanted the ones who put out. Laurel dated arty-assholes, theatre-assholes, and a couple of jock-assholes. No asshole-assholes.”

Cable had a look into Wade. His feelings for Laurel were fraternal; even a hint of being indignant that he’d fuck around with her. Odd. Wade’s sexual appetite these days ran to “willing and having a heartbeat”.

“I kissed her once when we were drunk,” Deadpool admitted. “She smelled _great_.” He sighed at the memory. “I knew if we got together I’d fuck her over. She was too good of a friend for that.” Cable and Domino were stunned. Wade’s loyalty was sometimes surprisingly strong and his boundaries with certain people surprisingly clear. Laurel fit into that category with him.


	2. Tasting Salt and Metal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or is the dayspring hidden from you/like the darkness hides the stains/on your heart; a veil for the truth?

Laurel’s  thoughts kept returning to Cable no matter how she tried to force them away and think about the article she was supposed to be writing. She appreciated the hard muscle of his body, and the immense strength that emanated from him. She had dreamed of running her fingers over the planes of his face and over his scars before leaning in for a kiss. She’d awakened flushed and clutching her sheets. It was in the back of her mind, but she was ignoring meeting the thought head-on. 

_ Laurel Bevingete, you’re attracted to a hulking soldier from the future with a techno-virus who reads poetry.  _ Your _ poetry.  _

Laurel became a fixture in the X-Force wing of the house. It wasn’t unusual to find her with Domino, Negasonic, and Yukio in the common room after a day out shopping, or hanging out with whoever wasn’t away on a mission watching TV, playing board games, or telling stories. Colossus was still chuffed about having a published poet and freelance writer around, and nearly swooned when she’d read some of her poetry to him. The guest suite unofficially became Laurel’s second home. 

On a sunny afternoon Cable came into the kitchen, sweaty from a workout. He poured himself a glass of water and saw Laurel and Domino on the patio reading magazines. The contrast between them was striking. Domino’s dark skin shone in the sunlight, while Laurel’s pale skin was protected in the shade. He had no complaints of the view of them lounging in leggings and crop-tops. He guessed they’d flopped down on the lounge chairs after their run. For a human Laurel had decent stamina that matched Domino’s and the two of them ran around the property often. 

Domino’s phone chirped. She answered it and excused herself, walking out into the yard to take the call. Laurel put her magazine down, rolled up the legging on her right leg and started rubbing a dark bruise on her calf. Cable frowned, wondering where it had come from. He got another glass and filled it with water and went outside. 

“I know I’m not shiny and Russian, but I thought I’d offer you some water anyways,” he said with a lopsided grin. Laurel accepted the glass. He nodded to her leg. “What happened there?”

She sighed. “Well not Russian, but kind of shiny. This is from running into the post at the front of the driveway,” she said ruefully. 

“Fucker does tend to jump out at you unexpectedly,” he teased, and was rewarded with a giggle. 

“Yeah, yeah. I don’t need to be a mutant to have a special power of walking into things, tripping over nothing, or hurting myself in silly ways.” She crossed her arms and rubbed her shoulder blades. “If I’m not doing that, then it’s stiff muscles from sitting at my desk all hours, writing.” 

“Sounds rough,” agreed Cable. “I could try to fix those tense back muscles for you.” 

It was hard to read her expression under her large sunglasses. “Um, sure, I guess,” she said hesitantly. “Just be careful,” she cautioned. Cable stood up and stood behind her. 

“Careful of what?” he asked, his hands poised above her shoulders. 

“I’m just a baseline human. If you’re used to dealing with mutants they’re probably tougher than I am.” 

He chuckled. “Don’t worry, darlin’; I’ll be gentle.” 

Laurel blushed a little, hoping he missed it. He didn’t, and smiled to himself. He brought his hands to her shoulders and started rubbing gently. They were hard with tension. He started adding more pressure, slipping his hands under her shirt for a better feel. She hissed as he found a knot and worked it.

“I know,” he murmured. “But we have to get rid of them. I used to do this for my wife all the time.” Eventually the knot gave way and he moved on to the next. He kept going, finding the right balance between releasing the pain and too much pressure. He noticed that she was holding herself still, but was relaxing as he worked the tension from her.

He brought his hands to the muscles at the sides of her neck. “Jesus, Laurel, your neck is as hard as Colossus’.” He rubbed gently until her neck started to loosen. She dropped her head back and it rested on his thighs, the top just brushing his groin. He could smell her warm skin. 

“This feels so much better,” she said. He rubbed the base of her skull and brought his hands up through her hair until he was rubbing her temples. “I haven’t felt this good in - “

“Hey, I’m not interrupting anything am I?” said Deadpool loudly as he threw himself into the lounge chair next to Laurel. “Once you’re done rubbing down Bevingete, do you think you could give me some attention? You would  _ not _ believe how tight my back is.” 

“No,” growled Cable as the smoothed his hands down Laurel’s back and straightened her shirt. He took his glass and sat in a chair across from Laurel and Deadpool, in the sun.

“Aw, why not Big Daddy? Have I been baaaaad?” Deadpool whined. “Or not bad enough?” he asked in a husky whisper. “You should know that I taught Laurel everything she knows.” 

“Fuck off, Wilson,” Cable said flatly, his normal gruffness returning. 

“Well! I certainly know when I’m not wanted!” he exclaimed, and settled into the chair. 

Domino came back and raised an eyebrow at the pouting Deadpool, flushed Laurel, and sour-looking Cable. 

“I don’t know what I missed, but you three of you look  you’ve been up to something you regret,” she laughed. 

Cable let out a his breath. “You are like fucking children,” he said and went back inside. 

“That’s illegal in this time,” called Wade. 

“I’m going to have a shower and head home,” announced Laurel. “I have an article due in a few days and I’m too far behind.” 

Laurel went to her suite and stripped for a shower. As she reveled in the looseness of her shoulders what Cable said hit her. 

_ I used to do this for my wife all the time. _

His wife. His  _ wife.  _

She stood with the water sluicing off of her. What was she doing, thinking about a married man? Letting him put his hands on her? Guilt shot through her. She got out of the shower stall and dried herself off. She wiped the fog from the mirror and stared sternly at herself. 

_ Stop this right now, _ she told herself.  _ He has a wife and a child. He must be working on a way to get home. Don’t do this. _

“Don’t do what?” she asked herself out loud.  _ This,  _ she answered back. 

“Don’t do what?” echoed Neena from the bedroom. Laurel wrapped the towel around herself and stepped into the bedroom. Neena pointed at some clothes she placed on the bed. “Thought you’d want something clean to wear on the way home. You okay? Talking to yourself?” 

“Yeah, just...trying out some lines,” Laurel said. She’d found that so far any behaviour they found weird was accepted if she explained it as part of her writing process. 

She dressed swiftly and drove home. Even though her thoughts were racing she had a fantastic sleep that night. 

Damn Cable and his hands.

* * *

Laurel’s phone dinged.

[Wade: We’re heading to Sister Margaret’s tonight. Meet us at 9]

[Laurel: Sounds great. See you there.]

“The freakshows are at a table in the back,” Weasel said, handing Laurel a beer before she had a chance to ask. 

“You’re one to talk,” she scoffed. 

Cable was nursing a whiskey and Deadpool was pounding tequila. Both were feeling out of sorts. The bar was loud tonight. A younger crowd had happened in and Weasel had turned up some discordant electronic music. The front of the bar was a mass of twenty-somethings that made the atmosphere of the bar unwelcoming to the mutants. Cable adjusted his cloak to cover the gleam of his left arm. When he looked up he saw Laurel approaching their table, beer in hand. She looked a little paler than normal and had smudges of exhaustion under her eyes. 

“What’s with this music?” she asked sourly.

“Yeah. Is dubstep even still a thi-” Wade started before taking a sharp metal elbow to the ribs. “You  _ asshole!  _ You just broke two ribs!”

“They’ll heal,” Cable said.

Laurel sat at the table. “Where’s Neena?” 

Wade shrugged. “Getting another drink,” he said, and pointed across the bar. “Bevingete you look like shit, with all due respect.”

“Thanks. I’m trying to compete with level level of beauty,” she said. “I just need a night or two of decent sleep.”

“That’s my secret,” nodded Wade. “You can’t get a face like this without your beauty sleep.” 

Domino returned to the table. “What’s with this music?” she said by way of greeting. 

Deadpool nodded enthusiastically. “Right?! It’s almost as bad as - “ he looked around the table furtively - “dubstep”, he finished in a whisper.

Laurel had placed her phone on the table. When it started buzzing Wade grabbed it and studied the display. “Jesus Christ! There are like 76 missed calls from some asshole named Mark. The fuck? Is he your latest asshole boyfriend?”

Laurel shook her head as she finished her beer. “Ex-boyfriend. Serial cheater.”

Wade dropped the phone on the table. “Does he know you moved here?” Wade said. 

“I don’t think so.”

“Would he suspect?” asked Cable. 

Laurel considered. “Probably. But I don’t want to talk about Mark.”

“But,” protested Cable. 

Everyone turned to him. “He’s unhinged,” he muttered. 

Laurel looked surprised. “How-?”

“Precognition, mind-reading. He’s kind of like a witch,” offered Wade. “Robocop can read minds, move shit with his mind, and sort of see the future. He’s a freaky future wizard cop.” 

“You can read minds?!” Laurel sounded horrified. 

Nate was taken aback. “Well, I have rules. I try to stay out of human heads.” 

“Human? But aren’t we all…” Laurel’s voice faltered as she noticed the three mutants staring at her “...human?” she finished in a small voice. 

Neena snorted. “Scientifically? Yeah, I think so. Socially?  _ Hell _ no.” 

Cable’s jaw tightened. “My whole life is about fighting to keep mutants alive and out of cages.” His eye glowed for a moment. He relaxed his grip on the glass. “This isn’t your fight,” he said, gently. 

“Not  _ all  _ humans, am I right?” piped up Wade. “And definitely not our future Poetess-laureate with her bleeding heart. She doesn’t even like squishing bugs. She’d  _ never _ squish a mutant.” He drained his beer and stood up with a loud burp. “So many topics we need to avoid! Laurel’s asshole ex, the question of our humanity, and Cable’s powers. How awkward can we make the night?” 

Not so awkward that Laurel didn’t join them back at the house after the music finally got the best of them. Ellie and Yukio joined them, and Wade and Yukio’s byplay didn’t fail to make Laurel giggle. Tonight she sat subdued between Domino and Ellie drinking the decent beer that they’d bought on the way over. 

Cable sat a little apart in the dimmest corner of the room. Laurel had been avoiding eye contact and he was trying not to show that he noticed. He wondered about what was keeping her up at night. 

Colossus joined them after finishing up with the kids and his evening workout. “Laurel! You look exhausted,” he exclaimed. He turned to the mutants with a stern expression. “You are not keeping her out too late, are you?” 

“Aw, Dad,” whined Deadpool. “We promise we’ll feed and water her and put her to bed on time! Please let us keep our human!” the Ellie and Yukio  giggled, but Colossus wasn’t satisfied. 

“Laurel, I am concerned. Wade is idiot. What is wrong?” 

“Nothing, Pitor,” she said after the giggles subsided. “I can’t sleep sometimes when I’m writing.” 

“Your bosses should be kinder to you and your deadlines!” Colossus said hotly.

“No, it’s my own work. When things come to me I have to get them down. And then sometimes I feel like I have to write but it’s not quite right and…” she struggled for the right words. “The block keeps me awake.” 

“Oh,” he said and sat down, as if to say  _ cannot argue with your art.  _

Cable looked up at Laurel. What she said was true, but not the whole truth. She saw the extra tension in the set of her shoulders. She looked up and caught him looking and immediately looked away.

She downed the last of her beer and put her empty bottle on the table and stood up. 

“Oooh, you peeled the label off so neatly!” observed Wade. “Someone needs to help you out with that sexual frustration,” he said with a leer. He made eyes at Cable as he tipped his beer.

Laurel ignored him and left the room.

Cable noticed she’d been gone much longer than she needed to for a bathroom break or to get more beer. 

He slipped out of the room hoping no one noticed, but: “ go get her, tiger!” cheered Wade.  He moved quietly down the hall. A light was on in Laurel’s room. He peered in and saw her at her desk, furiously writing in a notebook. She flung her pen on the desk and sat back in her chair with a sigh, then tore the page out and ripped it into ever-smaller squares. 

“Goddamn it,” she said with a frustration and ferocity he’d never heard from her. She put her face in her hands, she shoulders shaking slightly. 

Cable knocked on the door. “Come in,” she called as she scrubbed tears from her face with the back of her hand. 

“Hey,” he said, and stood in the doorway. 

“Hey,” she returned flatly. 

“What’re you doing?” he asked. She let out her breath, angrily. 

“I’m trying to write. I get these ideas,” she gestured helplessly at the torn up paper. “But nothing’s  _ good.  _ And I can’t sleep from all these thoughts and ideas.” A tear trickled from an eye and she palmed it away angrily. 

Cable saw the exhaustion and tension in her and took a step towards her. She jumped nervously from the chair. 

“Laurel?” he asked, perplexed. 

“No, no,” she said as if to herself. He reached out and took her hand and guided her to sit with him on the bed. She drew a shaky breath. 

“Laurel what’s wrong?”

She looked at him and tried to smile, but her lips wavered and more tears came. 

“You ever try to do the right thing, but it’s  _ hard?” _ she asked, her voice breaking. 

Cable grunted. “You have no idea,” he said tersely. Immediately he regretted how harsh he'd been when he saw Laurel's face fall. “Come here,” he said as he put his arm around her. “What's really upsetting you?”

She didn't say anything, but cried silently. He ran his hand through her dark hair and considered looking into her mind, but rejected the idea.

He rubbed her neck. “You're undoing all my hard work,” he said. He could smell her perfume, something spicy, sweet, and floral. 

Laurel turned her face to him. “I can't -” she broke off as he leaned in to press his lips gently to hers. 

She leaned in to him, and he deepened the kiss. She shifted so her body faced him. She returned the kiss and bit him lightly on his lower lip. He pulled her over so they were laying side by side on the bed. “You can't what?” he asked, huskily.

She reached up and touched his face lightly. “You.” Not caring to understand what she meant, he kissed her neck and she shivered. “Nathan,” she whispered before pulling his lips to hers, kissing him urgently.

He pulled away from her and she reached up to pull his shirt off. He rolled onto his back, and she laid beside him, tracing the scars and the border of flesh and metal on his torso. Her touch was light, but it felt like fire. He groaned as her hands reached his neck and she leaned in to kiss it. He felt her tongue explore the grooves of metal and flesh. 

She tasted salt and metal. He smelled of some deep, resinous cologne that nearly made her delirious. 

Nate could feel the desire pouring off of her, but also felt the deep pool of exhaustion within her. 

“Darlin’ let me help you get to sleep.”

Too tired to do anything but take him at his word, Laurel crept under the bedcovers. As soon as he stopped kissing her the exhaustion hit her like a wave. Nathan crawled into bed beside her.

“Come here,” he growled and pulled her against him. He pillowed her head on his arm and stroked her hair with his metal hand. 

“Just sleep, sweetheart,” he whispered. “Whatever's bothering you, we can work it out in the morning.”

Her breath deepened and she snuggled in closer to Nathan, seeking the warmth of his body.

“I'm sorry,” she whispered as sleep swept her under. 

Cable laid beside her, feeling the tension melting away as her sleep took her and her breathing deepened. He was prepared to stay motionless beside her all night, if needed. He closed his eyes, thinking of system checks on himself. Without realizing it he drifted off too. 

Colossus made his rounds before he turned in for the night. Laurel's door was still open and her light still on. He went to turn off the light and saw Cable and Laurel asleep, both looking peaceful. He turned off the light and shut the door softly, shaking his head, but smiling. 

Cable woke just before dawn, surprised at himself. He'd been running on ragged hours of sleep since arriving here and last night was the most he'd had. He pulled his arm out from under Laurel without waking her. He stood up and tucked the blankets back around her. He picked up his shirt and went to leave. His attention was drawn to the open notebook. Even in the low light his cybernetic eye saw clearly. Without thinking he read the lines written on the page she hadn't torn out:

_ Or is the dayspring hidden from you/like the darkness hides the stains/on your heart; a veil for the truth? _

He let himself out of the room and tried not to think of what she meant with that.


	3. Anchored

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Neena knew what she was doing.
> 
> This is where the NSFW comes in.  
> Also, Russell/Firefist asking Laurel if she and Cable are each other's booty-calls.

“So I’ve been thinking…” announced Deadpool to the rest of X-Force.

“Don’t hurt yourself,” grumbled Cable.

“Fuck you, Summers. I’ve been thinking we should invite Laurel to stay here.”

Rushing before anyone could raise an objection he continued: “She’s here more often than not, and it just doesn’t make sense for her to pay rent on a separate apartment. I’ve decided that she can move into the X-Force wing with us. ”

“Wade, this is not your decision to make,” started Colossus. “But if Neena and Nathan agree, is okay.”

“Of course, I’m tired of living in this never-ending sausage factory!” cracked Neena.

Nate shrugged. “Guess she has the same right to be here as I do.”

Laurel had protested; she didn’t want to intrude on her friends. The reasoning that it wasn’t worth her paying rent convinced her, as did Neena’s entreaty that more feminine energy would balance the house. She agreed to break her lease and Wade helped her move her belongings in. She didn’t have many things to store; the furniture belonged with the apartment. Most of what they brought over were books, clothing, and her writing materials.

She fit seamlessly into the house, adding to the atmosphere. Domino, Nega, and Yukio were pleased to have another woman in the house and all of them appreciated the note of stability that she brought. Colossus was thinking of asking Professor X if he needed a writing instructor for the children.

About a month after moving in full-time Professor-X did ask her to teach a poetry writing class. She found herself nervous meeting him, but his quiet, strong demeanor put her at ease. As she walked beside him through the academic wing of the mansion he explained how she could help.

“Many of the students have trust issues with non-mutants. Understandably so: many of them were attacked or thrown out of their homes by their own families. Along with being a writer you’ve bonded with mutants; choosing to live among them. You occupy a unique liminal space as an inside and an outsider. I want you to explore this with the students. Make them see the good in humanity again.” Looking down at the man in the wheelchair Laurel felt the weight of the responsibility and honoured by his trust.  

Initially the students weren’t enthusiastic, thinking of stuffy sonnets and pre-twentieth century poetry. Laurel introduced them to modern poetry and it’s freedom. She wasn’t teaching about other poets, but trying to nurture the poet within.  Being teens, most of the students were overflowing with feelings that they had a hard time expressing, and even more so with the changes and challenges they faced as mutants.

One student was hard for her to reach: a sullen boy who sat alone at the back of the class. He steadfastly refused to respond to his first name, answering only to Firefist. He spoke about Laurel, not to her. Laurel saw through his facade to the angry, frightened boy within. She tried to give him his space while still keeping an opening for him to engage her.

After class one sunny Friday he hung back, not joining the rush of students to leave. Surprised, Laurel looked up as he approached her desk. He thrust a magazine at her.

“You wrote this?” he demanded. She saw the volume of  _Analogue Vision_  that her poem  _Argon_ had been published in.

“I did,” she said, steeling herself for his criticism. Instead the boy paced a little in front of her desk.

“Hey, want to go for a walk?” she suggested. “It’s Friday afternoon and I don’t want to be in school anymore.” his face started to break into a grin before he clamped his normal stone-faced expression. He grabbed the magazine and rolled it up.

“‘Kay,”

The strode out into the grassy area behind the school. Laurel sensed that Russell was working up the courage to say something to her.

“You live with those mutants.” it wasn’t a question.

“Yes. I knew Wade when we were your age. I came here after things went wrong and I moved out here to start new and found him. Changed but still Wade,” she explained.

“Aren’t you afraid they’ll hurt you?”

“No,” she said. He looked up at her, expecting more.

“Look, Firefist. I understand that it’s a bit different for mutants who’ve just discovered their power, or are especially powerful. Sometimes accidents happen. But X-Force are…I guess I’d say ‘mature’ mutants. They’ve been through training or don’t have powers that are dangerous to me.”

He kicked at the clover in the grass. “But we’re not always in control at the school.”

She considered. “Yeah, you’re right. That’s why you guys in my class are a little more advanced with your power control. Professor Xavier feels there’s little risk. “ He looked up at her, clearly not believing. She laughed.

“I know. But really, when I lived off site, on my own, you could say that I ran the same risk of being hurt by a mutant as I do in the classroom. I still feel like a non-mutant has a higher likelihood of hurting me. Car accidents, muggings, random petty crimes. Besides, I like it here better than living on my own.”

Russell thought about it. “Cool. Thanks Laurel!” he jogged away.

“It’s Ms Bevin…ah fuck it,” she muttered. He was already out of earshot.

Russell started turning in homework and participating a little in class. It frustrated her that he called her by her first name, while he referred to the mutant instructors by their title and last name. She understood why, but hoped it wasn’t setting a bad example for the others.

X-Force has been rotating out for missions more frequently. Laurel wasn’t privy to what they did, but with her freelance writing and the poetry class her days were filled. Russell appeared on the patio one day as Laurel sat outside marking assignments.

“Is Deadpool home?” he asked hopefully.

“Are you supposed to be over here?” Laurel asked. “I don’t want you to get into trouble.”

“Nah, but no one will know unless you tell on me,” he grinned cheekily. “‘Sides, DP and me go way back.”

“No, he’s away on a mission.”

“Cool.” Russell plopped down in a set at the table. “Hey Laurel, some of the kids said that you’re Cable’s girlfriend. I told them you’re not, because he has a wife and kid in the future. That’s true, right? You’re not Cable’s girlfriend.”

What the fuck. This rumour had Wade’s fingerprints all over it.

“No, Nathan and I aren’t dating. How do you know about his family?” she asked curiously.

“He’s why I’m here,” Russell said with a touch of pride.

Laurel put her pen down. “He came here, to the past to save his family.”

“Yeah,” said Russell, meaning  _obviously._

“What does that have to do with you?”

“I killed them.”

Laurel didn’t know what to say.

“Yeah, he came here to kill me so I wouldn’t kill them, but Deadpool saved me and Cable saved Deadpool and that’s why he can’t go back. Don’t you know about this?”

“No,” she said, her mind reeling. “I just knew he came here to save his wife and daughter and couldn’t go back.”

“Oh, yeah. That’s because of me and Deadpool. Cable tried to shoot me, but DP took the bullet so he could die and prove that I was worth saving. Cable broke his time-travel thingie so he used his last charge to go back and save Deadpool. And I still got to be saved.”

Russell swung his legs and looked around X-Force’s yard, while Laurel tried to take in what exactly had led to Nate being stuck in their time. He did it to save  _Wade?_

“Hey, Laurel, got any cookies?” Russell asked hopefully.

“Yeah, Deadpool’s been out so he hasn’t had a chance to eat all of them. Let’s go inside.” Laurel led the boy into the kitchen and gave him the box of cookies. Russell looked in the fridge and took a can of Coke Zero from Laurel’s stash.

“How many can I have?” he asked, waving the box at her.

“Um, whatever, Take what you want,” she said. She sat heavily at the kitchen table. Russell took a handful of cookies and shoved the box at her.

“So you like Cable, then?” he asked. “Want to be his girlfriend? That why you’re so shocked?” he asked.

Laurel sighed. She did  _not_  want to have any part of this conversation with a fifteen-year-old-boy. Or anyone, honestly.

“No I just…hadn’t heard the story.” she faked a smile. “I’m surprised that Wade hasn’t been holding it over Nate’s head this whole time.”

“So  are you and Cable booty-calling each other, then?”

 _Wade, I swear to fucking god…_ ”No, Nathan and are don’t do…booty calls.” The very idea of Cable and “booty call” was hilarious. She bit her cheeks to stop herself from smiling.

Russell’s attention seized on something else. “You call everyone by their real name?” he asked. Laurel nodded.

“It feels like I don’t have the right to call someone their mutant name, but as you know I’ll use whatever name is preferred,” she explained. “Does that makes sense?”

“So it’s a sign of respect?” he asked.

“Yeah, you got it. I want to speak to you as equals. Human-to-human.” Russell took a sip of his pop and eyed her.

“You think I’m human,” he said. Laurel nodded. “Even though I was going to kill Cable’s family?”

“What you do doesn’t change what you are.”

“Huh. Poets are weird. No offense Laurel.”

“Non taken,” she smiled. “You should head back to the student side before someone notices you’re gone.”

Russell scrambled to his feet. “Yeah, right. Thanks for the cookies.”

“Sure, Firefist.”

Russell headed towards the door, then turned. “You can call me Russell,” he said. “See you Monday!”

Each year the X-Men held a gala for mutants and humans on their side to fundraise and get together in a safe place. X-Force was expected to make an appearance, and Pitor had invited Laurel.

The galas at the X-Mansion were well known for starting off fancy and ending in debauchery with the younger crowd. Wade was looking forward to getting drunk on high-end liquor and Colossus was determined that X-Force should set a positive example. Cable didn’t particularly want to go, but Colossus insisted. When Domino mentioned that she was in charge of finding something for Laurel to wear and that it was – quote  –  _fucking hot,_  he decided he could at least make an appearance. The three men headed over early. Neena and Laurel took their time getting ready.

Having never been, Laurel was worried about what to wear. Neena had promised to help her and provided a tight deep plum-coloured dress that fit perfectly and set off the darkness of her hair and fairness of her skin. Laurel felt a little uncomfortable wearing something so out of character, but Neena’s entreaties got her to try it on, and even she had to admit that she looked good. Neena gave Laurel an appreciative leer as they made their way from the X-Force wing to the main part of the mansion.

“Girl, the boys aren’t going to know what hit them. You look delicious.” Neena knew what she was doing, and couldn’t wait to see Cable’s reaction when they made their entrance.

“This is one of my favourite colours,” Laurel said happily.

“Lucky for you,” smirked Neena.

Cable was in a dark suit and a dark shirt drinking one of the best beers he’d had in this time. He kept away from the main crowd partly from habit and partly to watch for Domino and Laurel. He saw them appear together and his mouth went dry. She never dressed fancily at home, but she always looked good. Tonight she looked gorgeous. Domino caught his eye and winked.

He started towards the women but Deadpool intercepted them first. Handing Laurel a glass of wine, he whisked her around the room to meet the inhabitants of the X-Mansion. He watched her smile while meeting the X-Men and their guests. Cable sat back and watched, content to wait for Deadpool to finish hoarding her time.

He saw Laurel alone at the bar, waiting for another drink. He stood behind her and brushed her hair from her shoulder. She wheeled around and smiled, then looked him up and down and smiled approvingly. “Hello stranger,” she said. “Don’t you clean up well?”

Cable offered his arm as he lead her to a quieter corner. “Also a gentleman; remembering I fall over while walking on a good day,” she giggled. Cable looked down her plunging neckline and felt a tightening in his groin. She looked up at him under her eyelashes, smiling. Maybe this night wouldn’t be so bad after all.

They chatted while finishing their drinks. Laurel placed her empty wineglass on the table and tapped her feet.

“What have you been up to with the kids?” asked Nate.

“ They’re learning how to write and perform slam poetry,” she said.

“I sounds…violent,” he said “not what you want to be doing with young mutants.”

“No!” she protested. “It’s meant to be  _performed_. It’s like dancing instead of choreographing a dance,” she explained.

“Are you much of a dancer, Ms Bevingete?” he asked in a low voice.

“Jesus, no!” she laughed. I can’t run up the driveway without plowing into the light standard.”

“What about something more my speed. Slow, for an old man?”he said, with a gleam in his left eye.

“I didn’t think of you as someone who danced,” she said. “But I would love to. And if I fall over you or something else you’ll have to carry me,” she said, offering her hand.

“Of course, darlin’,” he said, and his deep voice sent butterflies fluttering in Laurel’s stomach.

Cable led Laurel to the dancefloor as a slow song started. He held her close, and felt her heart beat faster. She looked up at him with as they swayed together. Deadpool saw what was happening and directed the DJ to play another slow song. Cable and Laurel stayed together and she rested her head against his shoulder as he tightened his arms around her. The second song song ended and immediately a jarring Skrillex song blared out of the speakers.

“Asshole,” said Laurel against Nathan’s chest. He couldn’t help but laugh.

She stepped back from him and he guided her away from the thrashing dancers around them. They passed a waiter, and Nate deftly took two champagne flutes with his metal hand as he walked Laurel out to one of the balconies.

She stood against the railing, Cable behind her. They finished their champagne in silence. Cable put his hands on Laurel’s shoulders and smoothed his hands down her arms. She leaned backwards into him. Cable spun her by the waist so she faced him, and leaned in to kiss her, slowly, to give her time to back away.

She didn’t. She tilted her face to him and met his lips. He kissed hungrily, and she opened to him while pulling him down to her. He groaned.

“ _Laurel,”_ he whispered. He felt her heart pounding. He brushed a strand of hair from her face.

She stood on her toes to kiss him and swayed. He steadied her.

“You’re drunk,” he said.

“A little. Less than the first night we met. I know what I’m doing,” she replied.

“What  _are_  you doing?”

“Trying to figure out a way to get you back to my room,” she said with a wicked grin.

“Just say the word,” he breathed. They rushed back to the X-Force wing and Laurel pulled him into her room.

Cable shut the door and closed the gap between them in a few strides, pushing her up against the wall. He stood right against her, hands against the wall on either side of her. She tilted her face up to him defiantly. He looked into her wide, gray eyes.

“Tell me you want this,” he growled. She said nothing, but didn’t move. She lowered her eyes to his lips, then looked up at him. He leaned in, waiting.

“I want  _you_ ,” she breathed.

He took her in a deep kiss, his flesh hand cupping her face. He felt the heat in her cheeks as she returned the kiss desperately; her desire for him coming through as clearly as if he’d looked into her mind to see it. Her hands gripped his neck and she felt the roughness of metal meeting skin. She pressed against him, feeling the hardness of his body, the hardness of  _him_. Nate looked down her dress and saw the blush across her breasts.

He traced her collarbone, then turned her against the wall and pressed into her. She moaned as his kisses fell like hot rain on the side of her neck and across her shoulders. He could feel her through dress as she arched her back to press herself against him. He unzipped the dress and it fell to the floor at her feet.

“What do you want?” he said in his deep rumble.

“Mmm, you, Nate.” He stepped back and stripped his shirt off. She pressed back against him hard, unwilling to lose the feeling of his body against hers. He bent and kissed her shoulders, down her spine. He unhooked her bra and it fell the the floor. His metal finger traced the curve of her ass through the black lace of her underwear.

She was warm under his hands. He spun her around to face him. He took her breasts in his hands and they felt made to fit.  Stroking the silken weight of one he took the other in his mouth and ran his tongue over the nipple. He felt Laurel’s moan of desire in his bones. He suckled her and listened as her gasps tore at the air. Her hands wound themselves through his hair and over his body.

“ _Nathan,_ ” she breathed.

He couldn’t wait. He picked her up and covered the space to her bed. He placed her down gently and then pressed himself against her. He kissed her neck and collarbones with lips and teeth, pulling gasps from her. She was moving under him like she was trying to press herself into his bones. He kissed his way down from her breasts to her navel and circled it with his tongue. He was so hard. Her hands moved in his hair to keep him against her. He leaned up to look down on her. Her eyes were closed and she was panting, her hands balled into the sheets.

She opened her eyes and smiled widely, reached up and traced his jaw with a fingertip. Like a feather. He shivered as she traced her fingertips over the scars on his face, lowering her hands to skim the scarring on his torso. Her light touch made him shiver and sent heat throbbing through him.

“Do you want this?” he asked again.

“Please, Nate,” she breathed.

He pulled her panties off and traced the soft fold of her sex, glistening with want.

“How much?” he growled.

“ _All of you,”_  she whispered.

He knelt between her legs and kissed up and down each thigh. Laurel’s moaning had turned into gasps timed with each moment his lips met her skin.   
  
The only thing she was aware of was his touch and her body’s response. She felt each kiss like fire with a matching jolt deep in her sex for each one. Longing built in her and as long as Nathan kept touching her it continued to build.

He suckled her breasts again, alternating between them as she panted beneath him; lost to what he was doing to her. Her hands clenched and unclenched rhythmically. He moved back down between her legs and pushed them apart.

 

He grasped her thighs, fingers sinking into the soft skin as he pulled her towards his face. He took his first taste of her as she cried out wordlessly. His tongue found her clitoris and he swirled around it with his tongue and sucked at it. Just when he thought she was about to come he pulled back and licked around her entrance. He built her up but wouldn’t allow her release over and over until she was writhing beneath him, her hands tangled in his hair.   
  
He heard her sharp intake of breath as he plunged his tongue into her, licking and sucking to match her breathless moans.

“You are beautiful,” he breathed into her. As he worked her with his tongue he held on to her hips, feeling her grinding against him. As he sucked her into his mouth again he entered her with two fingers. He pulled them in and out slowly. She felt herself hurtling towards the edge as he sucked and stroked her faster and faster. He kept going, a little faster each time. It was leading her further down a dark spiral of desire. His hot tongue probed and licked; backed off and started again. Her voice trailed off into a wordless moan as she came hard against his mouth and fingers, shaking with intensity.

He stood and swiftly removed his pants. They fell in a jangle to the floor. He knelt over her. Her flushed face looked feverish. He took himself in hand, the need painful but sweet. He kissed her as he stroked himself. He broke the kiss off and she grabbed his hips to pull him against her.

He knew he had her on the edge, helpless. He inched into her and held himself just inside. Immediately she started moving against him, tossing her head.

 _Not enough!_  She thought loud enough that she may as well shouted it at him. He moved gently, stoking her fire. He felt her legs shake as he moved her slowly towards the edge.

He pushed himself into her with a delicious slowness that tested his willpower. Laurel moved beneath him, trying to take more of him. He backed out and entered a small amount again. Laurel was tortured, wanting all of him thrust up into her again and again.

“Do you want this?” he demanded. In. Out. She closed her eyes and moved her hips pleadingly beneath him.

Her hands reached for him but he took both wrists in his metal hand and pinned them above her head.   
  
“ _Nathan,_ ” she breathed. Her desperation drove him as he plunged all the way in. He waited there, feeling her writhe beneath him, and then he slowly built his rhythm beneath her, quicker and harder each time he thrust into her.   
“Nate,” she gasped, and at the same moment he plunged his whole length into her. She kept repeating his name. He felt her orgasm building, the shaking within her.

“I have you,” he whispered. “Let go, sweetheart. Let go.” With a cry she came hard, like a wave breaking. As he filled her up he exploded, shuddering with the force of it. He pressed his face against her shoulder, unable to think in the aftermath. His hair was damp with exertion.

His face felt pleasingly rough against her skin. Laurel lazily trailed her hands up and down his spine, unable to speak. Her heartbeat was like a bird fighting against her ribcage.

When he felt her pulse slow and her breathing return to normal he propped himself up above her. Her eyes were closed, her hair damp, lips swollen from his hard kisses. She opened her eyes slowly and smiled at him. He growled and kissed her lightly up her neck.

“Your hair is a mess,” she said.  He flopped down beside her and pulled her against him.

“I don’t care,” he purred. He felt Laurel drifting off beside him. She grabbed his metal arm and wrapped it around herself. He listened to her breath deepen as she fell asleep. He laid awake listening to her heartbeat. He looked within her, seeking any regret within. All he saw was a vast contentment tinged with surprise.

She slept in, well past her normal waking time. Nate slipped from her room to give her peace, but kept a piece of his attention focused on her room, waiting to her to appear. As the day stretched into the afternoon he started to become worried. Finally there were no more weapons to clean, sort, or rearrange so he made his way to her room.

He knocked softly at her door. “Laurel?” he called. No reply. “Laurel,” he said louder.

_What did you do to her, Summers?_

Deadpool poked his head out of the room across the hall.

“Lover’s quarrel? Too fucking bad, Romeo. Some of us are trying to regrow our heads after drinking too much and your barking at the door is perturbing my zen! Not to mention all the noise you lovebirds made last night.” He slammed his door.  

 _Fuck it,_  Cable thought and opened the door. Unlocked, it swung open fast.

The living area was empty. Her desk was covered in sheets of paper she’d written on and more was strewn on the floor.  Crunched up balls of paper filled the recycling basket and the floor around it was littered with paper that had missed the bin. Her dress was in a heap on the floor where he’d dropped it last night, and the bed was unmade. As he moved further into her suite he heard the shower running and relaxed.

Her perfume lingered in the room, a ghost of what happened last night. He wanted to think about what was happening here, and yet didn’t want to overthink it.

_What are you doing here, Summers?_

Looking for an answer. Looking for a sign.

From the moment he saw her on the patio with Wade, Domino, and Colossus he’d been thinking of her and all the things he wanted to do to her.

But knowing her was dangerous. She was human, for Christssake. And him; living with an irreconcilable paradox in his mind. Wanting to go back, but not being able to. He was married, but his wife was unreachable in the which was no longer his future.

He let himself out quietly.


	4. Songbird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That is the voice of a man who was never meant to sing,”

Cable and Deadpool were sent away that same day, robbing Nate of the opportunity to talk to Laurel and ensure everything was okay. He shot her a text on the flight out:

[Nate Summers: Heading out on a mission with DP. No communication. Will miss you.]

As soon as he hit send he regretted adding  the last sentence. He squared his shoulders. _“Fuck it,”_ he muttered.

“Fuck what now?” asked Deadpool brightly. “Oh, I know! I know...wait, don’t tell me...are we fucking Poetesses?”

“Fuck off, Wilson,” grunted Cable.

It was going to be a long goddamn mission.

Wade and Cable had been gone for three weeks in South America. It was hot and humid and they had spent five days holed up together in a sandy beach head. Cable’s patience was gone and Deadpool just _would not shut up._ Deadpool’s glee at tossing sand at Cable and trying to work it into the mechanical joints of his arm, leg, and hand wore thin quickly. So did his endless recitation of a line about hating sand: _“I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere."_ Cable didn’t know the context of the line or why Deadpool started referring to him as Anakin but it wore away at his his fraying self-control.

As they walked towards the house Cable swore, seeing all of the lights on and hearing music thumping out into the yard.

They dropped their gear in the kitchen. Deadpool immediately went to the fridge and pulled out two bottles of beer. “Beer, big guy?” he offered. Cable grunted assent. It wasn’t Wade’s normal shitty brand, either.

Wade cocked his head towards the common room. “Wanna go check out the party?” He pulled his mask off and skipped away.

 _Fuck,_ thought Cable. _A party?_ He swallowed his beer and considered a positive: Laurel may be there.

The lights were off in the common room and all of the furniture was pushed to the back. The music grew louder as they got closer. Wade let out a whoop: “karaoke, motherfuckers!”

Colossus was warbling a song. Yukio and Laurel were laughing so hard they were crying. Domino was encouraging him, and Ellie looked bored.

_“Ninety nine knights of the air_ __  
_Ride super high-tech jet fighters_ __  
_Everyone's a superhero_ __  
_Everyone's a Captain Kirk_ __  
_With orders to identify_ __  
_To clarify and classify_ __  
_Scrambling the summer sky_ _  
_ _Ninety nine red balloons go by”_

“That is the voice of a man who was never meant to sing,” said Deadpool as he doubled up with laughter. “Jesus Christ just fucking kill him now!”

The women didn’t notice Cable and Deadpool with the noise and hilarity of Colossus’ singing. His song ended and he held the microphone out to Laurel. “I think is your turn,” he said with a smile. “Finally our ears will not bleed.”

Laurel took the mike. Ellie looked up. “Song number?” she asked.

“Um, 14,” she answered.

“Yay Laurel!” cheered Yukio.

Cable was curious. He wasn’t familiar with music from this time or karaoke as a pastime. Whatever Colossus had done seemed like an assault to music as an artform but he wanted to hear Laurel to understand if being terrible was the point.

“ _I feel it, it's coming_ __  
__  
_Rain, feel it on my finger tips_ __  
_Hear it on my window pane_ __  
_Your love's coming down like_ __  
_Rain, wash away my sorrow_ __  
_Take away my pain_ _  
__Your love's coming down like rain…”_

No one in the room moved as she sang. Laurel kept her eyes closed in concentration. When the song ended Yukio cheered, Domino cried “goddamn, girlfriend!” and Colossus wrapped her in a giant hug. Even Ellie looked impressed.

Deadpool clapped and whistled. “Knocked ‘em dead, Bevingate!”

Everyone looked towards the doorway at Wade. He waved. “Hi honeys, we’re hooo-ome” he sing-songed.

“I need another beer, who else?” asked Ellie. She got up and Yukio followed.

“Wade! Mission was successful, yes?” asked Colossus.

“Bad guys are all dead,” said Wade. “Cable didn’t try to kill me too much. I’d call it a win.”

Laurel put the microphone down. “Excuse me, guys, I need a drink.”

She passed Wade and Cable in the doorway. “Glad you two made it back; you in once piece,” she said, stabbing Wade in the chest with her finger. “It’s nice not to have to watch you re-grow any body parts.” She flashed a smile at Cable and went to the kitchen. He waited a beat, the followed.

As she poured water at the sink she saw Cable come into the kitchen. She turned around. “Hey,” she said.

“I had no idea that you could sing,” he said.

“Well, it’s not hard to sound good when you go after the worst guy in the room,” she cracked. Cable shook his head.

“No, you can actually sing,” he disagreed. Laurel grinned.

“Thanks.” she gestured to the patio. Want to sit under the stars with me?”

Laurel sat sideways on a lounge chair and patted to indicate that Cable should sit next to her. He sat down and she leaned against him. “How was it?” she asked.

Cable drank his beer. “Wade’s an ass, so situation normal. It wasn’t a hard mission, just a lot of waiting around.”

Laurel tried to smother a yawn. Cable pulled her down so they were both lying together on the lounge. He gestured at a constellation with his bottle.

“Ah, there it is. The only other constellation I recognize besides the Big Dipper.”

“Which one?” asked Laurel.

“The Queen’s Crown. Right there.”

Laurel saw the stars he pointed out with a W motion. “Oh, Cassiopeia.” she considered for a moment. “She was a queen in Greek mythology.”

They sat looking up silently at the stars. Laurel started to feel cold and burrowed herself closer to Cable.

“Hey, lovebirds. Don’t think that chair is rated for all your weight. Big Daddy there is probably too much for it to handle,” shouted Wade from the kitchen.

Laurel sighed. “He’s _such_ an asshole. Pitor sits in these all the time.”

Cable stretched beside her, and Laurel felt the ripple of his taut muscles.

“I need a shower,” he said, then kissed under her jaw. “Then I’d be interested to hear more about how you missed me.”

They went back to his suite. Cable went into his bathroom and showered, washing the grime of the mission off of him. He wrapped a towel around his waist and found Laurel lying on his bed, already naked. He laid beside her. “This is a sight I could get used to,” he said. He ran his fingers through her hair. “Now, did you miss me?” he teased.

“I missed you,” she whispered. She turned so her face was alongside his and kissed him. He groaned as she made it deeper, and he pulled her down son top of him. She kissed his neck and moved downwards, trailing kisses down his chest.

“How much,” he growled. She laughed against him.

“Should I tell you? Or show you?” she said. She sat up on him, tapped her lips and cocked her head sideways before kissing the metal side of his neck. “I think showing is more interesting, don’t you?” she breathed into his ear, and was rewarded by his shiver. She kissed him hard, her tongue slipping into his mouth. After each kiss she gently bit the corner of his lip. He kissed along her jaw, down her neck, and into the hollow of her throat. His senses were alive with the taste of her; the sounds she made low in her throat; the sweetness of her scent. He tried to turn her over so he could be on top, but she resisted.

“No, Nate, you wanted me to show you how much I missed you,” she said. He relaxed. She kissed lower down his body until she was at the towel, She pulled it off of him then circled her hands around him at his base and he shuddered. She rubbed him along her cheek, then touched the tip of him with her tongue. She took him into her mouth and he felt her tongue snake and circle. He held her face gently as she took him into her throat, her cheeks hollowing as she worked him. He thrust a little, trying not to hurt her. Her hands clasped the tight muscles of his thighs as she steadied herself beneath him. Her hair was trailed up over his torso like a silk sheet. He felt her hot mouth and firm lips wrap around his whole length. He tipped his head back as her tongue licked his length.

“ _Laurel,”_ he ground out in his deep, husky voice. He’s getting close, too close, and he pulled her up right onto him. Immediately she started grinding on him. She ran her fingers along his face. He sat up and pulled her to him, holding her tight against him. He kissed her neck as she threw her head back. He held one of her breasts and circled his metal finger around the areola then across the nipple as she gasped.

 _“Come for me, Laurel,”_ he commanded. He felt her muscles tighten around him, as her hips flexed. He rubbed at her clit as she felt herself dissolving into her orgasm. She cried out his name as she came.

“Open your eyes,” he growled. He could see a sliver of grey around her pupils. He held her gaze as he groaned her name through his deep, long release. He laid down, bringing her down against him.

“Huh, I guess you missed me too,” she smiled. He kissed her in return.

She shifted so she was lying beside him, and stroked his hair and rubbed his neck. He closed his eyes in contentment.  Laurel ran her fingers lightly over the criss-crossing metal pieces on his left side. She closed her eyes as she fell into sleep, her face pillowed on his left arm.

She woke before him and dressed quietly. She pulled her hair up into a ponytail as she went into the kitchen, following the smell of coffee. Wade was slathering a piece of toast in jam at the counter. He took one look at her and started laughing hysterically.

“L-l-l-aurel!” he shook helplessly. “Oh my god, I can’t breathe! Hehehehe.”

Colossus peered at them from behind his newspaper. “Wade, is not nice to make fun of-” he broke off. “Holy Mother,” he whispered.

“What?” asked Laurel with a blush.

“Yeah, red makes it stand out so much better!” Wade cracked. Domino came into the room.

“Jesus, girl. Did you sleep on a cheese grater?” What happened to your face?”

Laurel put a hand to her face and felt markings on it. She’d slept on Nate’s metal side. 

“Laurel and Robocop, sitting in a tree! F-U-C-K-I-N-G! First comes love, then comes...probably not marriage. Then comes...Christ woman please don’t reproduce with that asshole!” Wade has holding his sides, still laughing. “Oh god, would your baby be a quarter metal? Hope Dr. McCoy can do a c-section; you don’t want _that_ pushing through your love tunnel.”

“You know…” started Laurel, exasperated. “At least _I’m_ getting some,” she pointed out.

“Touché,” he said, and turned back to his toast.

Cable woke up as Laurel left the room. He waited until he heard her go down the hall, and then he got up and went into the bathroom. He stood before the mirror and looked at himself, which he normally avoided.

He ran his hand over the metal on his chest and noticed how the infection crossed the midline above his right pectoral. He hated seeing his flesh give way to the metal, Even Aliya had pointed out the inroads the infection made. She was frightened of it; what the advancement would mean for him and if it would ever turn up in their daughter. He’d never allowed Aliya to touch him on his metal side when they were in bed together. But Laurel; she seemed to accept it almost too easily. Her only comment about it had been _I’m not worried about it._

He grimaced at himself in the mirror, and as if in response a wave of pain shot through him.

He showered and dressed. It was Saturday, so Laurel wasn’t teaching. He went into the kitchen and heard her talking out on the patio with Wade.

“Laurel, I know you’ve never taken my advice when it comes to your love life,”

“Do you blame me?” she snapped.

“Not really.” Wade took a deep breath, “Joking aside. How serious is this thing you have going on with Cable?”

Cable set the mug down, telling himself he should walk away, but unable to.

Laurel sighed. “I don't  know. We haven’t actually spoken about it,” she said.

“Hmph,” Wade said dismissively. “How do you _feel_ about it? About him?”

There was a pause,

“I like him, a lot,” she said quietly. “But...I know he has a wife and a daughter”

“He can’t get to them,” said Wade.

“Yeah, not now. Maybe not ever. But he came here to save them. Isn’t anything else a complication?”

Wade sighed. “Look, Beningete, you have a shitty track record of attracting total assholes. As much as he’s a total dick to me, Cable isn’t an asshole.”

“What are you saying?” she asked, puzzled.

“I’m _trying_ to be the voice of reason, and it’s really fucking hard! Look, he’s had a shitty life. Look at him. He's infected with something that will turn him into a deadly microwave if he doesn’t hold it off. He comes from a horrible dystopian world and he’s lost his wife and kid. Maybe you’re good for him. Maybe you can help him ease his  resting bitch face. I don’t know. Just don’t throw whatever you have away because you’re afraid.” Wade said.


	5. Captive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All of the non-con tags are for this chapter.

Cable left the kitchen and went back to his suite. He laid his weapons out and as his practiced hands went over them his thoughts roamed.

He hadn’t allowed himself to think too much about the situation with Laurel; but he faced the truth after listening to Wade: he had feelings for her. He wanted lie under the stars with her and have nights where she was panting his name with desire. He wanted a life with her.

He frowned as he started to re-assemble one of the guns. Being with her here didn’t negate what he had with Aliya, did it? The fact that he was here, now meant that Aliya and Hope had the chance to live and move on.

Moving on didn’t mean forgetting, did it?

“Nate?” Laurel’s soft voice startled him

He jumped, and whirled around.  
  
“Christ!” he exclaimed. “Shit, sorry sweetheart, you startled me.”  
  
“Should I even be able to do that?” She asked.

“No, but I was distracted,” he gestured at the weapons laid out on his workbench. “What’s up?”

“I have a meeting in town with an editor today, and I probably won’t be back until late this evening, but…” she trailed off and lowered her gaze.

“We should talk,” he finished.

“Yeah. Anyways. I wanted to give this to you,” she said offering a paper. He could see her tight, neat handwriting on it.

“What’s this?” he asked as he took it.

“This is going to be in my next volume. I can’t come up with a good title for it, and I thought maybe you could help.

He smiled. “I’ll try, darlin’ but almost anyone else in the house would be better. Colossus seems like he has a poet’s soul.”

Laurel shook her head. “No, just you.”

Cable stood up and held Laurel against him, and pressed a kiss to her cheek. “See you tonight,” he whispered in her ear, smiling as she shivered.

“It’s a date,” she said and turned away.

He shut the door and sat on his bed to read the poem she’d passed him.

He felt chills by the time he finished reading, the last lines hitting him like a punch: _my soul in ashes,/my heart in a cage_

Maybe she understood him more than he gave her credit for.

The day stretched out longer than it had any right to. All of X-Force was home; only Laurel was out. He tried to think of how to approach his conversation with her, then tried _not_ to think about it.

He wondered what Aliya was doing, then tried to forget that too. His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he seized on it.

“Hello.”

“Nathan? Nathan?” Laurel sounded panicked. Her voice was tinny as it she was coming through on speakerphone. “Nate! Let me go! What are you - “

The phone went dead.

Cable jumped up and strapped his weapons. Using his powers to interface with his phone He sent a group text to Colossus, Domino, and Deadpool:

“Someone has Laurel. We’re heading out to get her.”

He let some of his power free from fighting of the virus, just enough to locate Laurel. They followed him to the X-Jet, the air between them bristling with anger.

“Whoever is behind this is gonna wish they’d never been born,” snarled Wade. Colossus nodded with a fearsome sneer. Cable said nothing, his mouth set in a grim line, his eye laser-bright. Domino sat beside him and watched as he programmed the coordinates to an empty industrial complex.

Laurel struggled to open her eyes. A bright light shone into her face and she squinted against it. Her mouth was dry. Her thoughts were like bubbles in the wind: fragile and wandering without her control. She was lying down on something like a hospital bed, her wrists in restraints.

“Awake yet?” asked Cable.

“Nate? Where - “

“Where are we, what happened, and why,” Cable ticked off on his metal fingers. “Every time you wake up we go through the same questions. Can’t you ask something else?” She was confused by Cable’s references to the conversations he said they’d already had, why she couldn’t move, and the cruelty in his voice.

“Open. Your. Eyes,” he demanded, low and commanding. She tried, but kept squinting in the harsh light. He blocked the light with his head, and she saw a cruel smile turn up his lips. He grasped her neck with his metal hand, feeling her pulse flutter with fear.

“That’s it, darlin’” he breathed. “Be _afraid.”_

Deadpool ran ahead of the team, headlong into a honeycomb orange shield. “Fuck! Cable, what the fuck?!” Deadpool recognized the shield from his first fight with Cable.

“It’s not me,” Cable roared. He looked beyond the shield to see Laurel. His mirror image was in front of her, his metal hand closed around her throat.  

“She can’t see you or hear you,” the man called. “So don’t bother.”

“Cable what the fuck?” whispered Domino. “That man - “

“Is my clone,” Cable ground out.

“What in the _ass?!_ “ exclaimed Deadpool.

“Stryfe.”  said Cable, his eyes never leaving Laurel.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Stryfe called as he slapped her face lightly. She moaned. “Wake up,” he cooed.

“Nate, I can’t move,” Laurel said, her voice little more than a whisper.

“I know darlin’, I’m trying to fix it,” he picked up a syringe and tapped it. “It’s time for another injection.”

“No, Nate, no more,” she moaned.

“Shh, doll.” he plunged the needle deep into her arm. “We just need to see what this is going to do. After all, Daddy’s married to a mutant. Seems fitting that he’d have a mutant in this time too.”

“ _What the fuck?!”_ muttered Domino. “What’s he doing with her?”

Wade had a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. His mutant powers had been unleashed in a similar situation. The thought of Laurel going through that torture was too much for him to bear.

“I should leave you alone,” Stryfe said as he sat on a stool next to Laurel. He traced her cheek and pushed her head to the side exposing the curve of her neck. He started to rub it lightly, then bent down to kiss it. “But you’re here and just...so...tempting. Besides extreme emotions like fear are supposed to make this work better.”

Cable clenched his hands and tried to push through the shield. Stryfe raised a finger. “Try anything and I’ll kill her,” her said flatly. Laurel didn’t respond, and he turned his attention back to her.

“Someone drugged you,” he whispered in her ear. She shivered. “But I think I can help you.” He crawled up on the bed and kissed her, pushing his body against her. She trembled under his weight. Stryfe grabbed her hips and pulled her into him.

“First I’m going to fuck you,” he grumbled against her. He pulled her shirt off and tore her bra off and kissed a trail across her collarbone with his teeth. Laurel inhaled sharply. He yanked her skirt and panties down and pushed her legs apart. Stryfe freed a hand to take off his pants, and kicked them away.

“You clone motherfucker!” yelled Deadpool. “My friend is not a plot device for you to fuck around with to cause Cable issues. Let her go and take your issues out on us.”

Laurel weakly tried to push him off of her. “Nate, no. Something’s wrong with me,

“Doesn’t matter, darlin’, I’ve got you.” Stryfe felt her fear, but also the feelings she held for Cable. He kissed her neck and ground himself against her as he grabbed her shoulder with his metal hand hard until she cried out.

“You better be good or I’ll have to hurt you, “ he growled. A vein was throbbing in Cable’s forehead as he tried to figure out a way to get to Laurel.

Stryfe thrust into Laurel hard. He drove into her incessantly. His body slapped indecently against hers.

Laurel tried to pull away, but couldn’t. “Nate, slow down; you’re hurting me,” she whispered.

“I have to, honey. Shhh. You’ve been drugged.” He moved his hand to her hip where he gripped her tightly, forming another bruise. He thrust into her again. He stroked her face as he held her pinned while he was inside her.

“Do you want this, Laurel? Do you still want all of me?” He bit her neck and she cried out. “You’re not a very good girl, Laurel. Fucking a married man.”

“What are you doing?” she whispered. “Why are you doing this to me?”

“Shhh,” he said. He kissed her savagely, and bit her lip until he drew blood. He smeared the blood up onto her face, all the while driving into her without pause. He felt his orgasm building like a savage heat within him so he stopped.

“Be good, Laurel. Then I can help you,”

He thrust until he felt he was too close, then pulled out.

“Almost, my darlin’. You're so good; so good for Daddy.” He felt her fading and backhanded her across the mouth. Her lip split.

“Stay with me,” he demanded.

“Nathan, I can't, I'm...I can't think and you're…”

Cable choked on his rage, helpless.

“This part is almost over, darlin’,” he said. He closed his metal hand tightly on her neck.

“Nate...I can't breathe,” she wheezed. Her consciousness ebbed and stars filled her vision. Stryfe came hard into her, snarling.

He wiped himself off with her shirt,  and pulled his pants on.

Laurel tried to move, but was still held in place by the restraints. “Nathan, please help me.”

He drew a knife from its sheath at his ankle and traced it across her collarbone, a delicate beading of blood following the tip. “No,” he said flatly. “I’m not here to help you, Laurel. I’m here to _hurt_ you.”

Cable made a strangled growl in his throat. He knew if he tried to break through while his clone was holding a knife to Laurel he’d kill her. Yet watching him hurt her was too much to bear. Her fragility was painfully evident under Stryfe’s hands. Feeling her think that it was _him_ doing this to her was tearing a hole within him.

“See Laurel, there’s a problem. You’re dead where I come from. Mutants killed you. My mutants. You got in our way.

“But my little adventure here means I got to meet you here and things got tangled up. We have this serum to test so I figured we could see what kind of a mutant we make before we kill you.”

Laurel’s drug-fuzzed mind couldn’t keep up. “Oh, poor girl,” sighed Stryfe.

Laurel looked at Cable. The way he moved wasn’t quite right, and his scars weren’t the same.

“Why are you doing this?” she whispered, tears falling from her eyes. “This isn’t you. I don’t believe you’d hurt me.”

“Shhhhh.” Stryfe wiped away her tears, gently. They mixed his the blood on her face. He put his fingers to his mouth and licked her tears and blood off. He leaned in very close to her. “That’s where you’re wrong, Laurel. I want to hurt you _very much._ That’s _all_ I want you for.”

Laurel was helpless. She couldn’t move and even if she could she knew she couldn’t overpower or outrun Nathan.  

“Let me go,” she whispered. “Please, Nathan.”

“No, honey. Not yet. We're just getting started “ He put the knife down and picked up another syringe to ensure she stayed drugged and didn't notice the inconsistencies between him and Cable. He needed her to continue to believe this violence came from Nathan.

Deadpool caught Cable’s  eye and nodded slightly. “Right. Do something to get us in there. The three of us will take on Stryfe. Domino, you grab Laurel and get the fuck out of here.”

Cable pushed against the shield, roaring and shaking. It cracked and X-Force burst into the room.  Stryfe started towards them and got tripped up by Laurel’s shirt. He lurched for the trio of men. Domino waited, then darted in behind him and grabbed Laurel.

She picked the human up and ran from the room. She continued running until she had Laurel inside the X-Jet. She put Laurel down on a seat and covered her with one of Cable’s discarded cloaks. The smell of him made Laurel retch, but Domino was more concerned about keeping her warm.

“I’m going to take off and then I’ll come help you,” she said. Laurel was shaking. Domino took off, then enabled autopilot and went to check in on Laurel.

Laurel’s shakes hadn’t subsided, and Domino thought she was going into shock. “Beast, it’s Dom. I’m coming in on the X-Jet with Laurel and she’s hurt and shocky. I’m bringing her straight to medical.”

“Shh, Laurel, it’s okay. I’m here.” Domino grabbed a medkit so she could start cleaning the blood from Laurel.

“Neena! Neena, what happened? Oh my god, it was Cable and  he, he,” Laurel’s shaking increased and she vomited. She was covered in cold sweat. The jet landed, and Domino carried her into the X-Mansion to the medical bay.

“Dr. McCoy!” she called. He was already there in his white coat. He directed Domino to put Laurel onto a medical bed.

“Shh,” crooned Domino as she brushed the hair from Laurel’s forehead. “You’re okay. I’m with you. Dr. McCoy is going to look you over.”

Beast turned to the two women with a syringe containing a sedative. When Laurel saw the needle she started screaming and thrashing on the bed, but Beast was able to inject her smoothly. Soon Laurel stopped fighting and her breathing evened out.

“What - “ he started, looking down at Laurel’s bloody, tear-stained face.

“Cable has a clone. A bad dude. Sounds like he specifically came to hurt Laurel and fuck with Cable.” Domino drew a breath. “This Stryfe guy raped her in front of us, hurt her, and then went to kill her. He injected her with something a number of times that seemed to drug her, and he mentioned something about Cable needing to have a mutant here, like his wife is there.”

“Jesus,” whispered Beast.

“Yeah and Laurel’s under the impression that it was actually _Cable_ doing it to her.” Domino tucked the blanket in around Laurel a little tighter.

“Good god,” breathed Beast. “Never mind whatever physical trauma she’s been through, the mental and emotional strain is going to be incredible.” He looked down at the sleeping woman. “I’m going to run some tests on her while she’s asleep. Given what’s happened you should be here when she wakes up. Or Wade, she trusts him.” Domino nodded. “I wouldn’t want to be the messenger, but someone needs to tell Cable to stay away. We need to make her understand that it wasn’t actually him. Even so, her mind won’t be able to reconcile that.”

“When will she?” asked Domino. The blue-furred man hesitated.

“I’m not a psychologist, but it may take awhile. Or…she may never.”

“Oh fuck,” said Domino.

The fight raged on. Cable and Stryfe were evenly matched. Deadpool and Colossus were able to get strikes in, but the other two men seemed determined to fight to the death. Cable reached out his hand and his gun flew into Stryfe’s head, knocking him backwards. Cable threw one of his generated shields at Stryfe, pinning him.

Stryfe grinned. “It’s enough, you asshole,” he laughed.

“What is,” demanded Cable.

“How much I broke your little doll. And hey,” he held up his wrist. “Now I get to go back to your time and tell your wife about the baseline human you’ve been fucking. Not _that,”_ he smiled, “that is _more_ than enough.” Stryfe poked his wrist and winked out of existence.

Cable slumped to the floor.

Deadpool rounded on him. “You motherfucker. You have a lot to explain,” he spit. He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and called Domino. “How is she?” he barked. Domino answered: asleep, being looked after by Beast. “Send the jet for us,” snarled Deadpool.

On the way Cable explained the connection to Stryfe which cooled most of Wade’s anger. Cable was not any more to blame for what had happened than Laurel was.

When they got back to the X-Mansion they all went to the medical bay. Beast stopped them.  “One at a time,” he said.

“Tell us how Laurel is,” pleaded Colossus.

“I assume you saw what he did to her? She was in shock when she came in, but became hysterical at the sight of a syringe,”

“He drugged her,” said Cable.

“Physically she’s okay; her injuries aren’t serious. I’m still running tests on what he injected into her to see if it’s more than a sedative. She might have a few scars.  Mentally, though...that was quite a toll.

“Can I talk to her?” Wade asked.

“If she’s awake. But please don’t push her. I’m trusting you, Wade.”

Wade nodded and pulled his mask off, handing it to Cable. “I’ll look after her, buddy,” he said.

Wade entered the medical bay and found Laurel and Domino together. Domino met his eyes and stood up to leave. She smoothed Laurel’s hair.

Wade sat beside his friend. Her face was cut and bruised. Her lips were swollen and stitched. She reached a hand out to him and he took it, noting the bruise that encircled her wrist. Must have been from when Stryfe first grabbed her.

He sat silently in the dim room with her, wanting  to be there when she woke up.

Laurel stirred in bed. He leaned in to whisper to her. “Laurel, honey it’s okay. It’s Wade. You’re okay.”

“Wade,” she said. Tears fell from her eyes. He wiped them gently.

“It’s okay, Laurel.” He took her hand and held it as tightly as he dared.

“It wasn’t him?” Wade’s heart hurt at the question; that it wasn’t a statement.

“No. I was with him. I was there the whole time. He’s the one that found you.” explained Wade.

Laurel closed her eyes and more tears fell. “I know, I know he wouldn’t hurt me but I _thought_ it was him. I _believed_ it was him. At the time.”

“How could you have known?” asked Wade. “This is a strange world you came into, Laurel.”

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“No, honey. Don’t be sorry.”   

She closed her eyes and drifted into a dreamless sleep.


	6. Empty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Her plan had been to cultivate an emptiness within, a place where she could live without emotion..."

Laurel was almost never alone as she recovered from what Stryfe had done to her. Dr. McCoy pinpointed the serum that Stryfe had injected her with and determined it was an attempt to change her cellular structure to promote mutation. He hadn’t lied: he was trying to make Laurel into a mutant.nev

“Seems like Laurel’s DNA is as normal as possible,” Beast told them. “It puts her at a lowered risk of genetically-induced cancer and makes nearly impossible to turn her into a mutant.”

Domino had finally voiced her fear to Beast after recalling Wade’s mocking of her sleeping with Cable - had that really been the same morning Laurel had been taken?  She recalled Wade’s words: _oh god, would your baby be a quarter metal?_

Domino shook her head. Laurel seemed like a smart girl, but ending up pregnant by either Cable or Stryfe would be catastrophic. There’d be no way to tell who the father was.

Dr. McCoy assured Neena that Laurel had an IUD in place, and he ran a pregnancy check just in case. Domino breathed easier with that knowledge.

The team was shocked by the news that Stryfe had killed Laurel in the previous version of the future, and that fixing the timeline with his wife and daughter Cable had somehow prevented that from happening. All Cable knew of Laurel in the future was her work; he didn't know why she would have been a target for Stryfe’s group. Their connection was only based on this timeline.

Cable still hadn’t visited Laurel while she was awake. He knew she suffered from nightmares that had to include him, or at least his face. He watched over her as she slept. He’d lost his wife and daughter to time, and now another woman he had deep feelings for had been taken from him.

He visited her silently, at night, and only if she was sleeping. He often brought her a flower picked from the garden. He’d look in on her in the night to find her with it clutched in her hand.

Cable let himself into Laurel’s suite often during the night. He liked the reminder that she was a part of the house, and it smelled like her. He’d lay awake on her bed, thinking.

Once he flipped through a notebook that looked like drafts of her poetry. One jumped off of the page at him; titled _Dayspring._ She couldn’t have known that was one of his aliases. He hadn’t told anyone here. It mystified him.  

He kept away from the rest of the team most of the time, eating and working out alone. The rest of X-Force gave him his distance.  He was trying to work out his feelings. He knew that he felt something for Laurel, but seeing her helpless in Stryfe’s arms and knowing that he was trying to hurt and kill her had ripped him open inside.

Stryfe had insinuated that he’s come here to fix part of the future that Cable had altered; and the fix was to kill Laurel. Cable thought that since Stryfe couldn’t strike at his wife or daughter he came for Laurel. This pointed to a connection between all of them in the future; a connection that Cable wasn’t aware of. Somehow he had tangled Laurel’s future into his own.

Russell came to visit Laurel, bringing his poetry that he continued to work on. He often appeared when Deadpool was visiting her, and their bizzarro father-son relationship and interaction never failed to make her laugh; one of the few genuine laughs she gave. They loved the sound, hearing a bit of the old Laurel come through.

Late at night Russell crept into her room and shook her. She awoke with a muffled scream.

“Oh my god, Laurel! I’m sorry!” he said, abashed.

“It’s okay. What’s up, Russell? It’s late.

“Yeah. But I had to ask you this alone.” he sat at the chair next to her. “Do you hate mutants? Are you afraid of us now?”

Laurel shook her head. “No, Russell. That was one mutant.”

“‘Kay,” he said. “You aren’t going to move out when you’re better, are you?”

This was a point of contention. Laurel wasn’t sure if she could continue living in the X-Force wing, but was terrified of the possibility that Stryfe would return. If Colossus had hair he’d be tearing it out with stress about Laurel moving out.

“No,” she said. It was the easiest answer.

“Alright,” he said and scampered away.

Dr. McCoy felt that she could be discharged from the medical bay. She found all of X-Force except Cable sitting in the common room. Wade jumped up and wrapped her in a bearhug, pressing his scarred face to hers. He stepped back and looked at her.

“Wow! The stress-induced dieting had really brought out those cheekbones!” he crowed. He scowled at the light scar that tilted across her upper lip. “And welcome to the scarred face brigade! I’ll get your membership card to you soon.”

Colossus jumped up next and hugged her gently. “Laurel, is so good to have you home.”

Domino, Nega, and Yukio grabbed her in a group hug when Colossus let go. “I’ll get you some tea,” Colossus said. Laurel followed him to the kitchen.

Cable sat at the table drinking coffee and reading the paper.

“Hi,” he said softly.

This was the first time she’d seen him since Stryfe had abducted her. She sat down at the table opposite him and flashed a crooked smile. He saw the new scar on her lip and the harsher planes of her face. Anger flared within him and he struggled to shove it away, afraid that it would scare Laurel if she saw it.

“Hi,” she replied. Colossus tried to leave the room as unobtrusively as possible.

“I haven’t been outside in a while,” she said. “Want to sit in the sun with me?” He lead the way, conscious that she might feel uncomfortable with him following behind her.

They sat in silence.

“I want to ask how you are, but…” Cable started.

“It’s kind of a dumb question?”

“Yeah,” he said, his mouth set in a grim line. “I’m sorry, Laurel. I led him to you somehow.”

She shrugged. “It seems like your future and this present have become  tangled up. None of us meant for any of this to happen. You came here do to a job and go home. It just didn’t work out that way.”

The flatness of her voice brought a lump to his throat.

“This is home now,” he whispered.

“I’m not sure if it can be for me,” she said. Tears fell. “I know it wasn’t you, but...in my dreams it is. I can’t make it stop. And I’m afraid...of him. Finding me again. Or him finding me before I know you so no one can save me.” Her shoulders shook.

“Hey,” he said, taking her hand; steeling himself to feel her pull away. She didn’t. “Laurel. I’m here now. There is no going back, This is my life and I was lucky to have you come into it. You take time, all that you need, sweetheart. We’ll keep you safe. And I’ll do whatever you need me to do: stay by your side or out of your sight. Anything.” He stood and kissed the top of her head. “Just tell me what you need, any time.”

He walked back into the house. Laurel covered her face with her hands and cried silently. Her plan had been to cultivate an emptiness within, a place where she could live without emotion. Fifteen minutes into her first meeting with Nate and the emptiness was replaced by pain.

Neena came outside with a mug of tea. “Looked like that was hard to get through,” she said gently. She set the mug down. “Take your time with all of this, Laurel. Moving back into your rooms. Cable. Us. We’ll be here for you.”

Laurel kept to her own suite most days, venturing out at night. The X-Force team had found her asleep and awake in various rooms of the house in all hours of the night. They never mentioned it to her, but they knew she wandered around until she couldn’t stay awake anymore to keep the nightmares at bay as long as possible.

Wade came home late and found her wrapped in a blanket with a bottle of wine, sitting alone in the common room.

“‘Sup, Bevingete?” he inquired, stealing the bottle and taking a swig.

“What was it like for you when you thought you were going to die, but had to come back?” she asked softly.

“Which time?” he said, too brightly. Laurel sighed.

“In the ice box, or after Cable shot you. When you really thought you would.”  

“Laurel, you’re not -”

She flapped her hand at him impatiently. “No. And if I _was_ I wouldn’t admit it. I’m just trying to understand how to move on.”

Wade pulled his mask off. “Laurel all of us have scars. Internal and external. We all have to learn how to live with how we look on the inside and outside. But you can decide you wins. _You,_ ” he gestured at her with the wine bottle “or the clone. He wanted to take something from you and Cable. Try not to let him have it.”

“All I hear when I close my eyes are the things he - Stryfe - said to me. I can’t let go of it,” she said softly.

“Give it time,” said Wade. He moved beside her on the couch and put himself under the blanket.

They fell asleep together. Colossus found them in the morning. He smoothed the blanket over the two friends and hoped they’d sleep a little longer.

Laurel returned to teaching. The students knew something had happened to her, but Russell had been fierce in quelling rumours. He was the only student who knew the story and took it upon himself to guard Laurel from gossip. Once she came back to the classroom Russell started making visits to the X-Force wing to see her or Deadpool. X-Force became used to Laurel and Russell writing at the kitchen table, surrounded by discarded drafts and cookie crumbs.

“Hey, Deadpool! Laurel says I have the making to be a real writer one day!” Russell beamed at Wade. Wade snorted and looked in the fridge.

“Must mean you suck kid, ‘cause I hear Laurel tell everyone that anyone can be a writer if they try. Are you trying?” Wade grinned to himself.

“Yeah! Of course! Right Laurel?”

She laughed. “Russell, Deadpool’s right - “ Russell’s face fell “I did tell you that you _are_ a real writer.” Russell’s smile bounced back. “Now get back over to the cafeteria before you miss dinner. If you eat here Colossus will stuff you full of brussel sprouts.

“Eww,” said Russell with a face. “”Kay. See you in a few days!” He swiftly gathered up his papers and ran out the door.

“Brussel sprouts?” asked Wade as he cracked open a beer. Laurel nodded.

“Yeah, I dunno, It came to me one day and it works. Nothing gets him out of here faster.” she smiled as she picked up the discarded paper. Wade pointed at it with his beer bottle.

“What's all that?”

“He’s writing his life story and then he wants to work with one of the other students to turn it into a graphic novel.”

“Huh. Does Professor-X know that you’re training an army of writers to take over his school?” Deadpool asked.

“Would that be so terrible?” she asked. He threw the bottle cap at her.

“Pens are mightier than swords, isn't that what you people say?” he said with a grin.

That night Cable came home from a solo mission. The house was silent and he stole into it. He put his bags down in the kitchen and poured a glass of water. He looked around in the darkness, wanting to ensure all was in order before he took to his quarters. The light was on in the common room and he found Laurel scrunched into an armchair, asleep. He could tell she was going to have a terrible kink in her neck if she stayed in that position. He hesitated; they hadn;t exchanged more than a few sentences to each other since their conversation when she came back, and always in company. He knew she needed space, but he missed her. He sighed and smoothly picked her up from the chair to carry back to her room.

She stirred and put her arms around his neck. “Nate?” she said sleepily.

“It’s me, darlin’. I’m taking you back to your room.”

“No. Not there,” she protested.

“Then where?” he asked. 

“With you,” she whispered. “Don’t leave me alone.”


	7. Setback

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Healing isn't a linear journey.

Cable hesitated. If Laurel didn’t want to go to her room that only left his. Hearing no complaints or direction from Laurel, he took her to his suite. He put her on his bed, heart hammering.  _ If he fucked this up… _

He walked them to his room and put Laurel down on the bed. “Laurel, sweetheart, I’m going to have a shower. I’m covered in - I need to clean up,” he amended. 

“‘Kay,” she said sleepily. Cable covered her in his blankets. He got through the shower as quickly as possible. He dressed in a t-shirt and sweatpants, and tried not to think of the last time he had Laurel in his bed. 

Laurel had balled herself around one of his pillows and buried herself under the blankets. 

“Are you asleep?” he said in a soft whisper. 

“Not yet.”

He got into bed with her, ensuring she was lying against his flesh side.  She moved over to rest against him, and reflexively he started to run his fingers through her hair. She looked up at him with a small smile. His heart ached at the sight of the scar on her lip. He knew she had another on her collarbone from where Stryfe had dragged his knife. She’d definitely lost weight; her hip bones and shoulders stood out more prominently than before. He traced the cupid’s bow of her lip with a metal finger. 

He’d do anything to protect her and to help her heal from what Stryfe had done to her. Having her be able to be so close to him after so long was precious. 

Her eyes closed and she gave a small sigh. “You don’t smell like him,” she observed. “You smell good.”

Those words cut through him as he realized he and Stryfe occupied some of the same places in her mind. Separating himself from his clone would be a part of her healing. 

“How come we keep finding you asleep in strange rooms of the house?” he murmured. 

“Can’t sleep alone,” she whispered. 

“Turn onto your side,” he said. She moved so they were spooning. He ran his fingers lightly over her shoulders and neck; a ghost of the massage he’d given her before. He felt some of the tension release from her. He pressed his lips to her neck. 

“Go to sleep, sweetheart. You won’t be alone tonight.” 

A few minutes later her breathing evened out and she was gone. He stayed awake all night, and when her breathing indicated she was falling into a nightmare he caressed her gently and murmured to her. She could feel and hear his voice in her sleep, and gradually her sleep returned to normal. 

Laurel and Aliya were completely different. Aliya never needed protection. Aliya never felt fragile. But Laurel was strong in other ways, ways  in which Aliya had never been tested. They were different, but a continuum, he thought. 

The sky lightened towards dawn. Laurel had slept through the night with Cable motionless beside her.  When she awoke she turned to him.

“Mornin’,” he drawled. He was rewarded with a smile. “Sleep well?” 

“Yeah,” she said with surprise. “I slept through the night.” She sat up and stretched. “Thanks,” she whispered. 

The look of her messy hair and heavy-lidded eyes hit him heavily. He wanted to wrap her in his arms to protect her. He wanted to crush his lips against hers and hear her pant his name with desire. He settled with tracing her cheek with his hand, watching as she closed her eyes. When he reached her neck he dropped his hand, afraid of pushing too far. She leaned over and dropped a kiss on his lips. 

“I miss you,” she said.

“You don’t have to,” he whispered. “I’ll be right here.”  

She kissed him quickly again and then got out of bed and stretched. “Neena and I are meeting this morning for a run, and then I have to do my lesson planning for the week. What are you up to today?” 

“Not much, training, debriefing from the mission,” he replied, not acknowledging how she suddenly needed to put distance between them. 

“Maybe I'll see you around,” she said. He saw a hint of her old self in the glint of her eyes. 

“You just might,” he said with a grin. 

She went to her room to get changed into her running gear. Grabbing a water bottle she went to the kitchen. Colossus was having his coffee at the table while reading the news.  He put his tablet down. “Laurel, good morning,” he said with a wide smile. “You slept well. No one found you in strange place last night.” 

She blushed a little. He caught it. “Oh, I see,” he nodded. “Well, as long as you get enough sleep. Is what’s most important.” 

“No, I -” she started, but he waved her protest away. 

“Is okay, Laurel. I know,” he said with one of his wide, open smiles. 

Laurel couldn’t keep up with Domino; her stamina reduced by her weeks of inactivity. Her legs and lungs burned and she was happy to make her way back to the house. The women blended smoothies and took them out to the patio in the sunshine.

“Wade said you didn’t sleep in your room again last night. Where did you find yourself this morning?” Neena said, teasing gently. 

“Umm. Well...Nate found me last night and...you know I have a hard time sleeping alone, so he let me sleep in his room,” Laurel stumbled over her words, feeling like a teen caught in the act. Neena raised an eyebrow and put her smoothie down. 

“Laurel, whatever you need to do to get through this, do it. You want to know how I did?” Neena took a deep breath. “I came from the same boarding school that Russell did. The teachers abused the kids. All of the kids. Even when I got away I was scared and angry. I couldn’t put it behind me.” Her gaze was hard, her voice clipped. “ I know why you can’t sleep and don’t want to be alone at night,” she finished softly. 

“How did you make it stop?” asked Laurel. 

Neena’s face was grim. “I didn’t want to give those motherfuckers the satisfaction of winning. I pretended. I acted like everything was a-okay. And one day...it was.” she shrugged. “Nothing more than faking it until I made it,” she said. She looked up at Laurel with a sly grin. “And these days, I don’t fake  _ anything, _ if you know what I’m saying.” 

Cable was on his way to the main part of the mansion and he heard Laurel and Domino’s laughter as he passed the kitchen. It was one of the few times he’d heard genuine laughter from Laurel since the day and it made him smile.

That evening everyone drifted towards the common room, drink in hand as their duties wound down. Ellie and Yukio were trying to explain a drinking game to Domino and Deadpool as Laurel watched. Deadpool quickly started losing. Colossus pretended to read, but in reality watching over the group like a mother hen. Cable appeared last, beer in hand. He sat next to Colossus. 

“Is good to see them having fun,” Colossus said to Cable, nodding at the others sitting on the floor around the coffee table. He watched as Cable observed them, and seeing Cable’s objection, put his hand on the other man’s arm to still him. “No, is okay, Nathan. She isn’t playing the game.” 

Cable shot a look at the silver man, then relaxed. “I’m that easy to read, huh?” Cable asked as he popped his beer open. Colossus frowned. 

“No, I was worrying same thing.” The big man sighed, “Nathan, maybe I overstep boundary. Today  I spoke with Professor Xavier about - ” he waved his hands around “- these happenings with clone. He has thoughts I think you should hear.” 

Cable narrowed his eyes, then shrugged unconsciously. “You’re just trying to protect the team,” he said, with a long pull on his beer. 

“ _ Da,  _ and you are part of team too. Talk with Professor, please, Nathan. Will help you, I think.” 

“Wade, for  _ fuck’s _ sake!” shouted Laurel, equally angry and amused. Her shirt was soaked in beer. “God, I got some of your shitty swill in my  _ mouth,”  _ she moaned. Yukio and Wade collapsed against each other in giggles. “Oh, seriously,” she muttered. 

“I had  _ no idea -  _ “ started Wade.

“That shaking your can of beer, then opening would case  _ this?”  _ Laurel demanded. 

“ _ Duh. _ I was actually aiming for Domino!” he whined. 

“Bad luck, Laurel,” shrugged Domino with a smile. 

“I’m going to go get changed,” said Laurel, holding her beer-soaked shirt away from her with distaste. 

“Or - hear me out here: you could just - “ Wade started with a suggestive waggle of where his eyebrows once were. 

“ _Wade!”_ barked Colossus and Cable in tandem.

“Well  _ sorrr-rrry  _ for living, Big Daddies. A man’s gotta try,” said Wade with a smirk. Laurel smacked him lightly on the head as she walked by,

“Ew, you smell like piss-water shit beer,” taunted Wade. 

“Yeah well: your head feels like a football that was left out in the sun too long. Then a Rottweiler chewed on it, and the ball was dumped in a festering garbage heap,” retorted Laurel. Colossus tried to cover his laugh but failed. The laughter of the three women covered it with their peals of laughter. 

“That was colourful, Bevingete,” Wade said with grudging approval. 

Laurel strode down the hall and stripped her shirt off as soon as she entered her suite. She hadn’t drunk so much since...before...and she felt it, her head swimming. She went into the bathroom to get some water. She met her reflection’s gaze in the mirror, 

She’s been avoiding her reflection these days, trying to forget the scar on her collarbone and face. They were keys to the memories of what happened. 

The memories from her nightmares came back as she ran her fingers over the scars. Her head felt dangerously close to what Stryfe’s drug had made it feel. 

_ I want to hurt you  _ very much. _ That’s  _ all _ I want you for.  _

_ We're just getting started.  _

She vomited into the sink; the red wine looking like old blood. She stripped off the rest of her clothes and went into the shower stall. She turned the cold water on and sunk to the floor, waiting for it to numb her. 

_ Just one night being normal. Like before,  _ she thought. The cold water was almost painful, but this pain was welcome. 

In the common room Cable felt uneasy at how long Laurel had been. She’d seemed in good spirits, but...he reached out, and felt the despair and anger coming from her. He strode out of the room and ran down the hallway. Her door was open; the beer-soaked shirt discarded. He heard the shower running and went into the bathroom. She was slumped against the wall of the shower naked and shaking. He turned the water off and got in beside her. 

Her skin was covered in goosebumps and her teeth were chattering. He got in the shower with her and sat beside her,  gathering her into his arms. She turned her face into his chest and cried, her body wracked with shivers and silent sobs. She held him tightly, her cold arms like bands around him. 

As her sobbing subsided he stood up and carried her out of the bathroom. He sat her on the bed and looked around the room. He saw yoga pants and a hoodie slung over the back of her desk chair. He grabbed them and dressed her in them, her freezing limbs moving mechanically. Once he had her clothed he threw the bedclothes back and laid her down. He got in beside her and pulled the blankets over them. Her arms circled him again. 

“It’s okay,” he said in his deep voice. He rubbed her back. The warmth started to return to her limbs. 

_ “No,”  _ she whispered. “I’m not okay. It’s bad enough that I remember it at night, but now...I can’t explain it. It was - it was…”

“Like you were back there,” he said. 

She looked up at him, her grey eyes swimming in tears. “Yes, for a minute I was there again,” she said with horror in her voice. 

“A flashback,” explained Cable. “They happen after trauma. It’s normal.”

“How do you - “ she cut herself off. Of course he knew. 

“I’ve been through it enough myself,” he said. “The sleepless nights; the dreams; the sudden triggers in the daytime,” he listed. He touched the scars around his right eye, then the scar on her lip. “Seeing my scars,” he finished softly, as he held out his mechanical arm. 

“I’ll stay with you tonight.” 

“I don’t think I’ll get any sleep after this,” protested Laurel. 

“I think you will,” he counted gently as he passed his hand over her eyes. He used some of his psychic power to put her to sleep, willing to give up a minute amount of control over the techno-organic virus to do so. It didn’t cost as much to use on a baseline human, and in this case the violation of his ethics seemed worth it. 

The tension dropped from her suddenly, and her breathing deepened.  He planned to pay a visit to Charles Xavier the next day to follow up on the thoughts that Colossus thought he should hear about his clone and connection to this point in time. In the meantime he allowed himself to at Laurel’s side. 


	8. Without Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That didn’t feel like a goodbye kiss”

 

Cable headed over to Charles Xavier’s office. He typically avoided that wing of the Mansion; he knew that his father was in attendance as a student. He didn’t know if Scott Summers knew who Cable was, but Cable did and that was enough. The teenaged version of his father didn’t bear much resemblance to the adult he knew. Since this touched intimately on his own timeline and self Cable was more than willing to let it lie.

Charles was behind his desk in his office. He motioned for Cable to have a seat.

“I imagine that Pitor told you we had a conversation. He’s quite concerned about Laurel and you, for different reasons. Drink?” he asked. Cable nodded and Charles turned his chair to the liquor cabinet behind the desk.

“I need to know how Laurel’s been drawn into this,” Cable said impatiently. “Before I came here I only knew her name. Now it turns out she’s a target for Stryfe’s group in the future. Is it all a coincidence?”

“Do you think it is?” demanded Charles, handing him a glass with two fingers of scotch in it to Cable.

Cable shrugged. “I don’t know,” he said as he accepted the glass. He saluted Charles with it and drank half of it.

“It is, and it isn’t,” said Charles.

 _Of course,_ thought Cable. _Of course it’s not cut and dry._

“The past, present, and future exist at the same time. You know that they’re not fixed. Changes you make causes time to try to harmonize the changes made. Getting to know Laurel now, in her subjective present, has changed the flow of time around the two of you.”

Cable’s heart pounded. “So if I’m with her now...Aliya…”

Charles shook his head. “No, your past and future with Aliya is secure. But if you went back to that time you’d find that along with your memories of Laurel here there would be a different reality with her there. Perhaps she’s an ally, or sympathizer to your cause. A friend, or former lover. You’re the one who holds on to these different threads of reality, though. ”

Relief washed over Cable’s features as he finished his drink. “What should I do?” he asked.

Charles spread his hands. “I don’t know. If someone could go to the future and see what’s happening I could better answer that question.” he looked Cable in the eyes. “If you’re asking about a more personal matter...just do what will cause the least amount of regret.”

“With all due respect, Professor, that advice is bullshit.” Cable placed the heavy crystal glass down.

Charles nodded. “Most advice is,” he said.

Cable stood up. “Well thanks, I guess,” he said. Charles nodded.

Cable ran into Laurel heading towards Charles’ office. “Hey,” he said.

“Hello,” she said. Cable was pleased to see that the dark circles under her eyes had lightened and her cheeks had a hint of colour.

“Called in to talk to the boss?” Cable jerked his head towards Charles’ door.

“Yeah, I think Piotr said something to him, and Professor Xavier called me in to talk about some ideas he has.”

Cable’s face was hard. “Seems like Pitor and Charles have had quite the conversation,” he said grimly, then sighed. “But I know they have our bests interests at heart.”

“Charles called you in too?” Laurel raised her eyebrows.

“Yeah. Exact same story as you.”

“Huh. And were his thoughts insightful?”

Cable considered. “It remains to be seen,” he said cautiously.

Laurel nodded. “Well, I guess I’ll see what he says to say to me,” she said. “Worst-case scenario is he thinks I need to teach the elementary-aged kids.”

Cable gave a rueful laugh. “Hey, you never know.”

Laurel walked past him and gave him a playful punch on the arm. “Says you!” you called over her shoulder.

The office door was open and Laurel stepped inside. Charles was in the middle of the room. “Laurel, a pleasure. Have a seat,” he indicated the couch in the sitting area off to the side of his desk.

She sat.

“Pitor came and told me about your troubles since returning back to the X-Force wing. He’s quite concerned about you; and so are the rest of the team. I think that I can help you, or at least try.”

“How,” she asked in a near-whisper.

“Can I see?” he asked. She nodded. He wheeled his chair in front of her and reached out a warm hand to her forehead. He closed his eyes. After a few moments he dropped his hand and opened his eyes with a sigh.

“I saw it from your point of view, as you. Firstly I am so sorry, Laurel.”

Laurel nodded, her throat clenching as she fought back tears.

“There are two sources of trauma here. One is what was done to you. That is terrible enough to get over in its own right. The second was believing that it was Nathan.” Charles moved his chair back from Laurel to give her some space.

“I know that you understand that it wasn’t him. But your memories were made with the belief that it was,” he reached out and took her hand as tears slipped from her eyes.

“I can change it,” he said, softly. “I can’t take the memories of it away, but I can change it so that the memory isn’t of _Nathan._ ”

“What?” she said, her face set in lines of confusion. “How would that work? I remember thinking it was him.”

“I know, and it’s hard to explain. But if I do this it will be as though you always knew it was Stryfe. Your memories will be different.” He let go of her hand and rolled back further. “Think about it, Laurel. I know it’s a big thing to take in, so take your time.”

Laurel stood. “Thanks,” she said. “I feels a bit weird not to jump at the chance, but…” she paused, trying to come up with the right words. “I have to think over having memories changed. Even for a good reason.”

Charles nodded. “I understand,” he said.

Laurel’s steps were uncharacteristically slow as she made her way back to the X-Force wing. The sun was nearly down. She grabbed a sweater from her room and went out to the patio to think. She spread out over a lounge chair.

Cable came out, beer in hand. “You mind?” he asked. She moved over and motionned for him to lie beside her.

“What did he have to say?” Cable asked. Laurel explained Professor-X’s proposition. After she finished, Cable ran his hand over his jaw, thinking.

“Why wouldn’t you do it?” he asked, finally.

“It just seems…” she trailed off.

“Too easy?” he suggested.

“Maybe. I don’t know. Why haven’t you done something like this?”

“Everything that I’ve been through actually happened, even if only I remember it. Seeing Aliya and Hope die; that happened to me. To us. But I changed the outcome, and now they’re alive. But if I took away the memory...what is my purpose for being here, now?”

“You saw them die?” she asked in a horrified whisper.

“I did. They burned. Right in front of me.” His voice dropped to a whisper, then cracked. “I couldn’t save them. I had to do it this way.”

He steeled himself. “This isn’t about me. It’s for you. What you remember _didn’t_ happen. You remember a lie that Stryfe acted out in front of you.”

“Is this about...us?” she asked.

Cable closed his eyes. “Maybe. Yes. You, and me. I hate knowing that you have to relive thinking that I did that. I hate that it happened at all; but I see - I see your fear of me sometimes.” Maybe I’m selfish,” he admitted. “But I think it’s better for you to do this, too.”

“And what about us?” she asked softly.

He looked down into her eyes. “Something that I don’t want to have any regrets about,” he said. He touched the scar on her lip. “Something I don’t want you to have any regrets about, either,” he said as he leaned in to kiss her. He felt her hand against his cheek, and he covered it with his.

“That didn’t feel like a goodbye kiss,” Laurel said with a smile.

“It wasn’t,” he growled.


	9. Gone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You saw for yourself,” she said quietly. “They’re gone.”

Laurel woke up a few days later with her decision clear. She went over to the school wing of the mansion to see Professor X. He looked up from his desk at her knock, eyebrows raised. 

“I want to do it,” she said, standing with her hands clenched. 

He smiled. “I’m glad. How about in two days? That will give me time to get everything together.” 

“Yes, what time?” 

“Let’s say...seven o’clock. Meet us in the medical bay.” 

Laurel felt lighter with the decision behind her. She ran into Deadpool in his housecoat and fluffy slippers. He held a gigantic bowl of popcorn and had his unicorn plush tucked under his arm. 

“Laurel, hey. Want to spend some quality time watching some porn with me?” Wade waggled his hips suggestively. 

“As tempting as that is...I think I’ll pass,” Laurel said with a laugh. “It’s nice out, I think I’ll read out on the patio.” 

As she passed him Wade whispered to his toy. “Something seems different about her. Better. Happier.” 

Laurel grabbed a stack of magazines and her sunglasses. She moved one of the lounge chairs out of the sun and made herself comfortable. Before she could open a magazine she fell asleep. A little while later Colossus and Cable trudged across the yard carrying their training equipment. A smile lit up Colossus’ face as he spied Laurel. 

“Nathan, look!” Colossus pointed to the figure on the patio. “Sleeping, out in open like that!” 

Cable grunted. “We better not startle her,” he warned the larger man. They both changed their steps to be heavier, and allowed their equipment to clank. Laurel stirred, sat up, and stretched. 

“Hey guys,” she said, sleepily. “How was training?” 

“It was good. Much running and target practice. I still cannot get through Nathan’s shield.,” Colossus said with a slight frown. “There must be way to do it,” he mused. “Anyway,” he said with an exaggerated stretch, “I am tired. I think I will nap.” 

“Subtle,” muttered Cable. Laurel sat up and Cable sat down beside her. 

“I saw Professor Xavier,” she said. 

“And?” 

Laurel pulled her sunglasses off and met Cable’s gaze. “We’re going to do it; two nights from now.” 

Cable let out a breath. He put his arm around Laurel and pulled her into him. “I’m glad,” he whispered. “I don’t want you to carry this anymore.” He took her hand and brought it to his lips to kiss. “How about instead of finding you tucked away in a corner of the house tonight you just give up and come sleep with me?” 

“Nathan Summers, did you just ask me to sleep with you?” Laurel said with mock shock. 

“Not like that. Not until...just sleep, so you’re not alone,” he amended. 

“Yes,” she smiled up at him. 

Later that night, lying beside Laurel in his bed he wrestled with how comfortable it was to have someone with him who wasn’t Aliya. 

The light from the full moon streamed into the room and illuminated Laurel with it’s silver glow, turning her into a black and white photograph. He marvelled at the inner strength wrapped in her fragility, and the feeling of all that softness lying next to him. He leaned up on his elbow and kissed her silky hair. 

“Laurel Bevengete, I think I love you,” he whispered. He stroked her arm and pressed his lips to her shoulder, relishing how soft her skin was against her lips. She stirred in her sleep and he laid back down, not wanting to disturb her, marvelling at the revelation and at peace with it. He had thought that his heart would be divided between them; at war with itself over these two entirely different women, but instead he found that they shared it. 

The days passed slowly. Laurel tried to write and edit articles for her projects, but her mind kept wandering to how the process would go. X-Force were all out of the house on missions or training all day. She could have used distraction, even a running commentary slash insult-fest from Wade. 

The day of the procedure was excruciating. At six o’clock she leafed through her journal, wondering what to do about the passages that referenced the event. She decided to leave them, but ask Professor X his advice. 

At quarter to six she made her way through the mansion to the medical bay, suddenly wishing she had more time. The medical bay was made of gleaming white surfaces and bright lights. Beast met her at the door. 

“Laurel,” he acknowledged with a smile. “Nice to see you up and about.” 

Laurel gave a tight smile in return and followed him into a room in the back. The lights were dimmer. A chair much like a dentist’s sat in the middle of the room. Beast gestured for Laurel to sit in it, then he reclined it back and put a warm fleece blanket around her. 

“You’ll get cold, just like when you go under anesthetic,” he explained. Professor X wheeled into the room. 

“Laurel, how are you?”

“Fine. Nervous. But fine,” she replied. 

Charles smiled. “I know you’re nervous Laurel, but it will be okay. I’m going to have one of my young apprentices, Jean, watch. She has extraordinary abilities, and this is something that she needs to be able to control.” Charles gestured to a young ginger-haired woman who smiled. 

“Hello, Laurel,” she said softly. “I’ve been briefed about what the Professor is doing for you today. I hope he’s able to help.” 

“Of course I will be,” he said mildly. “Now, Laurel, lie still and close your eyes. Breathe deeply and relax.”

Laurel closed her eyes and breathed, thinking there was no way she’d be…

“She’s out,” confirmed Dr. McCoy. Charles took a deep breath and placed her hands on Laurel’s head. 

Immediately the wave of emotion from her memory hit him. He took a step back and steadied himself. He concentrated on Stryfe; on overwriting her knowledge that it was Cable. The mix of terror, despair, pain, and horror washed through him and pulled him under. They were as strong as her feelings for Cable. Charles struggled not to be drawn into Laurel’s memory. He grimaced as a sheen of sweat covered him. Laurel gripped the arms of the chair as a low moan started in her throat, rising to a wail. 

“Professor!” gasped Jean as she stepped forward and placed her hands on his arm. She felt the wave coming towards her, but let it wash through her as she supported Charles.

_ Jean, I underestimated it. Hold on to me,  _ sent Charles to his apprentice. She watched as Charles struggled with the swirl of memory and emotion and pushed her strength to him. She watched Laurel’s memories in horror, understanding the betrayal within the marrow of her bones. Anger rose within her as she understood exactly what had been done to Laurel by Stryfe. Her body shimmered as she gathered her strength. 

Both Jean and Laurel screamed in unison as Stryfe repeated his last phrase:  _ “We're just getting started,” _

Dr. McCoy stepped forward to pull Jean off of Charles. “No,” she said firmly, as she clenched her teeth and pushed through Charles into Laurel’s mind. 

“ _ Let me go!” _ screamed Laurel and Jean. Charles gave a wordless bellow as the three of them went limp and the lights went out through the mansion. 

Cable returned from his training to find the house empty. He knew Laurel was with Professor X and Dr. McCoy; they had told him to wait in the X-Force wing. He knew Laurel was in safe hands, and that this was the right thing for her to do but he still worried about the process. He glanced at the clock. Five to seven. He sighed. He poured a measure of whiskey and went to his room to seek solace in his weapons. He tried to lose himself in the rhythm of checking and cleaning them, but a part of his mind was keeping track of the time. He wanted to reach out to feel how Laurel was doing, but resisted the urge. Whatever Charles was working on didn’t need his presence interfering.

Cable heard footsteps and turned from his desk. Wade stood in the doorway. “Come in,” Cable said and gestured to the armchair across from him. Wade came in, clutching a bottle of beer. He was dressed in sweatpants and an old t-shirt. He sat forlorn and took a swig of beer. 

“Hey,” he started with a manic edge to his voice. “Look, I just wanna, I mean. Shit. The whole reason Laurel is in this mess is because she knows me. And came here. She met you, because of me. And because of that your asshole clone came to mess with you by getting to her. Jesus,” he said stopping to gulp more beer. “And now she’s having her memories scrambled up because who could live with what she went through?”

Cable sipped his whiskey and asked “you got a point to make, or are you just running your mouth?” 

Wade looked up from the floor and glared at Cable. “She’s doing whatever it is that she’s doing in there because of both if us. My fault for introducing her to a bunch of fucked up mutant mercenaries she decided to be friends with. Your fault for making her fall for you and giving that asshole something to use against both of you. She’s been through enough. You better figure out if you want to be with her or let her go.”

Cable’s face remained impassive. “Fine,” he said, and turned back to his weapons. 

“What the fuck do you mean, ‘ _ fine’ _ ?” demanded Wade. “Listen old man, if you-” Wade was cut off as Cable squeezed the glass in his hand and it shattered. Whiskey dripped over his metal hand as he pushed past Wade to the door. “What?” yelled Wade. 

“Laurel,” said Cable as he started running. Wade got up and bounded after him. When the lights went out Cable stopped short and Wade ran into him. 

“What the shit?” cried Wade. Cable’s eye painted the hall in an orange glow. Wade followed him to the medical bay. 

The men found Laurel, Charles, Beast, and another woman within. Beast was taking Laurel’s pulse as Charles supported the faint-looking redhead. 

“She’s okay, just unconscious,” said Beast. 

“That’s to be expected,” said Charles wearily. 

“Hey, I think you three better start explaining what happened before Big Daddy and I lose out shit,” warned Wade. “Starting with: who the fuck is she?” 

“Jean Grey,” said Jean quietly. She looked up at the two men. “And you’re Nathan Summers and Wade Wilson.” 

“What happened to Laurel?” ground out Cable. 

“Her memories and the feelings with them were stronger than I anticipated,” said Charles. “Certainly more than I expected. They were overwhelming. Jean supported me as I changed them but something happened.” He looked up to Jean. “What did you do?” he asked softly. 

“I took it all away,” she said with a touch of defiance. 

“What do you mean?” said Cable. 

“All of it, the whole experience.” 

“You mean she won’t remember?” asked Cable. “Stryfe….what he did?”

Charles placed his hand on Laurel’s forehead and cringed in anticipation, but relaxed. “It’s all...just gone,” he said with wonder. 

“Holy  _ shitballs, _ ” whispered Wade. 

“What about her scars?” asked Beast. 

Jean shrugged. “Childhood injuries. She split her lip falling at the playground and cut her collarbone climbing a tree.” 

“Jean, you can’t erase memories like that!” cried Charles. “It’s not possible.” 

“You saw for yourself,” she said quietly. “They’re gone.” 


	10. I'll Say it Anyway

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Stay with me,” she said after a long silence.

Cable gritted his teeth and asked “what about _Laurel?_ How is she going to be after this?”

“Better than we thought,” replied Charles. “All of the trauma is gone. The entire incident. It’s just...never been done like this before.” He turned to Jean. “You and I need to discuss this.” He turned back to the group. “Beast, what now?”

Dr. McCoy listened to Laurel’s heart and measured her pulse and breathing again. “She’s out, but it’s like a deep sleep. Likely her mind is...processing the changes. She is fine to go home once she’s awake.”

Cable swooped into the room and lifted Laurel into his arms. “I’m taking her back now. I’ll watch her. She needs to be home.”

“I agree,” said Charles, simply. “I know you, Wade, Neena, and Piotr will watch over her, and I think starting her from a place or normalcy is best.”

Cable cradled Laurel against his chest and strode from the room. Wade followed, uncharacteristically quiet. Cable took Laurel to her quarters and gently tucked her into bed. Wade refiled around on her desk and came into the bedroom holding a notebook. He gave it to Cable. “This is Laurel’s journal. I didn’t read it!” he exclaimed.

Cable took the book and put it on the bedside table. “And?” he asked.

Wade rolled his eyes. “She would have written about what happened. I think you should keep it until you can talk to Charles about what to do with it.”

“Oh,” said Cable quietly. “You’re right.”

Wade left the other man standing beside Laurel’s bed. He returned a few minutes later dragging the armchair from Cable’s suite into Laurel’s bedroom. “Sit,” he said. Cable sat. Wade looked down at his sleeping friend and darted in to kiss her on the cheek. “Watch her, Robocop,” he said and left the room.

Laurel slept on, breathing evenly. Cable brushed a finger over the scar on her lip, thinking that something so terrible had been re-written as a silly childhood incident. He shivered. If memories could be rewritten, how easily could a life’s story be changed?  He sat back in the chair and closed his eyes. There were so many different realities that only he held the threads to now. This was different; everyone knew the old reality...the _real_ reality except for Laurel. He wasn’t sure if what Jean had done was ethical, but he couldn’t argue that it would probably benefit Laurel to not remember living through it.

Lost in thought, he didn’t notice Laurel wake up.  “Nate?” she asked as she sat up in bed looked over to him with a wide smile. “Why are you in here watching me sleep? Where did that chair come from?”

Cable had nothing to say; he hadn’t thought how to explain why he was sitting at her bedside. He decided to ignore the question as he kicked off his shoes and laid down beside her.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

Laurel frowned. “I have a bit of a headache,” she admitted. “Is that why I went to see Dr. McCoy? And why I’m in bed?”

Cable sighed. “I think you have a headache _because_ you went to see Dr. McCoy and Charles.” He paused, not sure how to continue. “Laurel, do you trust me?” he asked.

“Of course,” she said, raising a brow. “Why would you ask that?”

“Just trust me that I can’t tell you why you were in the clinic, at least not right now. But you’re fine; there’s nothing to worry about.”

“Okay…” she said.

Cable sat and looked at her: her hair messy from bed; her eyes bright and free of dark circles; the pallor gone from her cheeks. For once, the smile didn’t fade from her lips too quickly.

“What?” she asked, blushing under his gaze.

He took her chin with his metal hand and turned her face to his. He kissed her, gently at first, and then with all the pent-up emotion he had been holding back. She moaned as she kissed him back. He cupped her face gently as his kiss became harder.

“How was that?” he said in his deep voice, the one she felt as much as she heard. “Feeling okay?”

In answer she pulled him down onto her in another kiss, running her hands up and down his hard back. She stopped to throw the blankets off of her and pull his shirt off before pulling him back down.

“Better than okay,” she whispered. She kissed his neck; both the flesh and metal sides and he groaned. “Much better,” she whispered in his ear. She kissed along his shoulders as her hands roamed up and down his sides feeling the hard muscle, lines of deep scars, and metal intrusion. He ground against her and groaned her name.

He pulled her shirt off and ran his hands over the smoothness of her skin. He bent down to kiss her neck and under her jaw, reminding himself to slow down. Touching and kissing her reminded him of how long he’d been unable to; how he felt watching her sleep by his side in the moonlight. He kissed her breasts and murmured “I can’t lose you.”

“Hey,” Laurel said, pulling his face up to hers. “You won’t lose me. I’m here.” He growled low in his throat and kissed her, his hands caressing her body. He pulled her pants off and took his off, their bodies hungry for each other’s touch. He parted her thighs, loving the softness of her skin under his hands and felt her wetness, tracing over her clit. She moved her hips against his finger. _“Nathan,”_ she gasped.

He paused above her, looking into her eyes. He held her gaze as he entered her, filling her all the way. He stopped once he was sheathed to his base. Laurel closed her eyes and moved against him.

“Look at me, sweetheart,” he said thickly. She opened her eyes and met his again and smiled. It almost undid him. She reached up and ran her hands through his hair.

“Please, Nate,” she begged. He complied, thrusting slowly and building up the pace  as she panted beneath him. He felt her squeezing him, knowing her release was coming.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered huskily. She dug her nails into his back as she arched against him, shaking.

“Oh, I-” she broke off as her orgasm rolled over her. She moaned as she came on him. He felt it and as her eyes drifted shut he hissed as he came, shuddering into her.

He laid on her, careful to keep his full weight off of her. They both caught their breath. He rolled off of her and pulled her to spoon against him. He held her tight against his chest.

Laurel felt his heart pound against her back. She took his hand and brought it to her lips to kiss. “What is it, Nate?”

He didn’t say anything, but his heart continued to race. Realization started to dawn on Laurel. She turned to face him, holding his face in her hands.

“You don’t have to say anything,” she whispered. Cable pulled her against him, holding her as tight as he dared.

“I’ll say it anyway,” he said against her neck, his breath making her shiver. “I love you, Laurel,” he whispered. He thought she hadn’t heard, or worse yet didn’t feel the same when she didn’t react immediately.

Finally, she lifted her head and looked at him, eyes wide with wonder, a small smile on her lips. “Nathan, I’m yours,” she said.  He pulled her back against his chest, both of their hearts beating wildly with the truth out in the open.

“Stay with me,” she said after a long silence.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he rasped.


	11. You & Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title and lyrics within are from "You and Me" by The Cranberries

Cable woke up, disoriented. It took him a moment to realize that he was in Laurel’s room. He was alone in the bed. He heard the shower running and relaxed. It was a luxury to sleep through the night. He heard the shower turn off and he sat up on the edge of the bed. Laurel come out of the room wrapped in a towel. “Good morning, sleepyhead,” she smiled.

“C’mere,” he growled. She strode over to him and when she got close enough he pulled her down onto his lap. “It’s your fault I’m so tired,” he murmured against her lips before kissing her.

“Hey, Bevingete, I thought we could- _what in the ass?!”_ cried Wade as he strolled into the room.

“Ever heard of knocking?” snapped Laurel as she adjusted the towel around her.

“Who has time for that?” he said, leering at Cable and Laurel. “My, my. Does Daddy Colossus know how you’ve been taking care of Laurel?”

“Get. Out.” Laurel’s voice was a deep growl, unlike anything Wade had heard before. He held his hands up as he backed out of her room.

“Okay, okay. Jesus. You don’t want to share. Fine. Can’t _wait_ to tell everyone!” Wade turned around and ran down the hall. They heard him calling “Guys, _guys!_ Guess what!” as he careened towards the kitchen.

Laurel sighed and dropped her head onto Cable’s shoulder. “I guess there’s no need to think about telling the team,” she sighed.

Cable stood up with Laurel in his arms, kissed her, and put her down on the bed. “I have to go,” he said with a lustful gaze. “I sure wish I could stay.”

Laurel laughed. “We’ll have time later,” she said. “I’ll see you tonight.”

After Cable left Laurel got dressed and sat at her desk, ostensibly to work on a few articles she had coming up for her freelance gig. Her thoughts kept returning to the night before and the words Nate had said. She sat daydreaming and writing for the whole morning, only stopping when startled to alertness by a knock at her door.

She was surprised to find Jean standing in the hall. “May I come in?” she asked. Laurel opened the door and let the young woman in.

“I wanted to see how you were after yesterday,” the slight redhead explained.

“After yesterday?” repeated Laurel, feeling like an idiot.

“With Dr. McCoy and Professor Xavier?” prompted Jean.

Laurel frowned as she thought back. The entire day was hazy. “I remember going to see Dr. McCoy and Professor Xavier. Dr.McCoy gave me a blanket and…” Laurel pursed her lips. “That’s the last thing I remember.”

“Okay, well. Great.” Jean stood up. “Seems like everything is as it should be.”

“Wait, what is going on? Nathan wouldn’t tell me, and now you’re here checking up on me...it’s starting to freak me out a bit.”

Jean looked at the older woman kindly and took her hands. “Nothing is wrong with you. You’re better than you know.” She smiled warmly at Laurel. “I have to head back; students-”

“Aren’t allowed over here, but you find a way, don’t you?” finished Laurel ruefully. “Fine. Thanks for checking on me for...whatever it was that happened.”  

Laurel wandered out, but no one else was home. She fixed herself a snack and read her book. When the day gave way to evening she opened a bottle of wine. After a few glasses she decided it would taste better in a bath, so she ran a hot bath and added bath oil. She lit a few candles and sunk into the water. She poured the last of the wine, surprising herself - she couldn’t remember the last time she drank a bottle of wine to herself.

The water was starting to cool off, so she drained the tub and got out. She dried herself off, then applied lotion all over. The lotion matched her perfume,  a sweet, resinous amber. She turned on music and sang along as she started to braid her hair, taking advantage of the empty house.

Wade, Colossus, and Cable came back, tired and sore from the mission. “Shh, hear that?” asked Colossus. The men paused to listen.

_“I don't pay attention to the ones who never cared_

_Find your own direction 'cause there's sweetness in the air_

_You will be the world to me and I will always be_

_Dwelling in this happiness, your gift of purity_

_You and me will always be_

_You and me forever be,_

_Eternally will always be_

_You and me…”_

“It’s Laurel,” said Wade with some surprise. “I guess the shrinks did do some good for her.” He looked over at Cable, who was grinning at the sound of Laurel’s happy voice carrying down the hallway. “Or was it you, Big Daddy?”

“You know what, dipshit? Maybe it was.” Cable surprised the other men with his smile. He dropped his bags and made his way down the hall. Wade looked affronted.

“Well, big guy,” he crooned as he wound himself around Colossus. “Guess that leaves us to-”

“Clean up, yes Wade. Good idea.”

Cable opened the door to Laurel’s room. Before she could take notice of him he crossed the room and spun her around into his arms.

“Oh, god Nathan! You scared me for a second!” Laurel’s cheeks were flushed from the wine and the hot bath. She swayed a little in Cable’s grip. He buried his face against her neck.

“You smell amazing. And you sound amazing. I’m lucky that I have you to myself.” He felt her blush as heat that crawled from her cheeks down her neck. Her robe started to fall open and he kissed along her collarbones.

“Are you taking advantage of me?” she asked playfully.

He kissed under her jaw and growled against her: _“yes.”_

He pushed the rest of her robe off and drew his hands along her shoulders and over her breasts. She threw her head back as he kissed her throat. Their lips met in a heated kiss. Laurel broke it off to pull Cable’s shirt off, then kissed him again as her hands grasped his hard shoulders. Groaning, Cable broke off the kiss and turned Laurel around, pushing her up against the wall. He kissed and nipped his way across her shoulders and she ground her ass against him, panting.

“So eager, sweetheart?” he grunted as he touched her wet slit. She pushed back at him and he laughed low in his throat. With his other hand he undid his pants and kicked them away. Grasping her hips he thrust into her smoothly.

“ _Jesus,_ Nathan, _fuck,”_ she gasped. He was taking her slowly and the wine, his touch, and the smell of him was intoxicating. He ran his human hand over the back of her neck and down her arching back.

“I want to see you,” he growled. Pulling away from her, he led her to the bed. He laid her down and kissed her, and groaned when she kissed back and bit his lips. He kissed down her neck and to her breasts, and sucked at one until she was writhing and panting beneath him.

He thrust into her again, as far as he could go and held himself there, as deep as he could inside her. She moved against him, testing his resolve. He loved her breathy moans; the feel of her hands and she ran them up and down his back. She put her hands on his hips, and pulled him, trying to get him closer.

“God, Nate, please,” she pleaded.

He kissed her neck and whispered into her ear: “please what?” He felt her shiver and gave a small thrust.

“Tell me, darlin’. Tell me what you need,” he breathed. He felt her clench around him.

“ _Nathan,”_ she panted. “ _Please,”_

“Please…?” he teased, moving so slowly against her. He rubbed her kiss-swollen lips with  his thumb.

“Please, please,” she repeated as he quickened his shallow thrusts into her. He felt her nails bite into his hips. He drew all the way out and then drove into her, pulling all the way out and in until she arched her back and cried out, wordlessly. He held her by her ass, pulling her into him as he increased his pace. He could feel her building.  

“That’s it,” he whispered. “Come for me, Laurel.”

“Ah, Nate, so...close….” she cried.

“Yes,” he hissed, as he felt her legs shake, and her grip on his hips tighten.

His husky cry and her throaty moan marked their undoing together. He collapsed on his arms on top of her, kissing her neck while she fought to catch her breath. He felt her runaway pulse in her neck.

When her ragged breathing calmed kissed her and rolled off of her. She snuggled against him, her limbs heavy. “Falling asleep on me, sweetheart?” he laughed as he brushed loose tendrils of hair from her face.

“No…” she whispered.

Laurel was jolted awake by the movement beside her. Cable got out of bed and rubbed at his bare chest as he made his way to the window. He stared out into the yard, moonlight glinting off of his neck and shoulder.

“Nate,” whispered Laurel. He turned back towards her, his cybernetic eye glowing in the dark. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, darlin’. Go back to sleep,” his voice was low, rough. Thicker than it should be. Laurel got up and went to him. She put her arms around him and pressed her cheek into his back.

“No, what’s wrong?” she asked softly.

He inhaled deeply, held it, and let it out. “The pain,” he said from between his teeth. “Sometimes it’s more than I can bear.”

She didn’t answer right away, unsure of what type of pain he’s referring to; physical or emotional? She tightened her arms around him.

“Tell me,” she whispered.

He unhooked her arms from around himself and led her back to the bed. “If we can do it lying down I’ll try,” he said. Laurel nodded. They climbed back into bed, both lying on their backs. Laurel’s hea was pillowed between Cable’s chest and arm, and he began running his metal hand through her hair.

They laid silently, Laurel waiting patiently for Cable, and Cable trying to find the words to explain.

“It _fights_ me,” he said bitterly. “All night. All day. Cell by cell it works to take me over. I think now I’m more machine than man.” He drew a ragged breath. “I feel it in me eating away. It never stops. I guess I’m lucky that it mimics human anatomy and that I can hack it.”

He drew a ragged breath. “Aliya...she feared it. What I meant for me, for us. She used to measure if it had grown every time she looked at me. She didn’t even know she was doing it. Sometimes I think she didn’t see _me,_ she just saw _it._ But I can’t blame her. And she stuck with me.”

They laid together silently for a time. “I just see you,” said Laurel. “I didn’t know that it’s a constant battle...that you see it as something other than you. But you’re all I see.”

“Not the fact that if I stop holding it back I would become a machine?”

Laurel paused to think. “But would you still be _you_ ? _”_ she grabbed his cybernetic hand and drew it down, winding her fingers with his.

“I don’t know. That’s what I’m scared of,” he whispered.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever fan-fic and first ever post to AO3 so I'm a bit nervous!
> 
> I have multiple chapters written so far, and I will be posting them as I edit and re-write. 
> 
> This is a slow burn, but things do get very NSFW as it goes along. 
> 
> The poems referenced:  
> Argon: https://sothisjones.wordpress.com/2018/07/22/argon/  
> Dayspring: https://sothisjones.wordpress.com/2018/07/22/dayspring/  
> (untitled): https://sothisjones.wordpress.com/2018/07/28/untitled/


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